The Stolen Heart
by Basma Khalid
Summary: It was funny how Killua could have such an impact on my life, it was like my world revolved around him and at times I felt helpless, but in an amazing kind of way.
1. Chapter 1

Chapter: 1

"A girl, the girl and a rock."

Hope:

The one thing you need the most, it can build you up, give you strenght, but destroy you when it turns into disapointment.

Luck:

Should be called state of mind, the more determination there is, the more success. Some people think it is present in objects, others think it depends on the specifity of time.

Rage:

A type of spell maybe, turns sweet into bitter, the angel into the devil itself. Horrible when it breaks the most important strings in life, but somehow necessary when it has a good reason.

Time:

An object, on the run. It exists but doesn't. It changes, but doesn't slow down, or speed up for that matter, and never stops. Somehow it's not there but affects the mind greatly.

Horror:

Also called reality. Those who have only heard of it are the ones who actually believe they've seen it. Those who really have, know that that was nowhere near to it all. It can be characterized as a slap in the face maybe, or at times something that takes a big chunk of your soul away.

Friend:

A sculpture. It can represent achievement or maybe portray something notorious. Impossible to live without, however, of the type real and fake, or maybe somewhere in between. It can serve as a spark to the candle or maybe a blow to silence it forever, or maybe until the matchstick itself lights it up again.

Love:

A fire, that consumes the very one who feels it. It's the heat that warms one until it starts to burn them. The flame that melts the candle, but even at the very end, there is never regret, even if there is some, it's clouded by the memories, and these memories set the person on fire.

The girl, or maybe "a girl", who knows. She's just a girl, who wasn't unique. Yes maybe she was "the girl", the girl who didn't achieve anything, the girl who wasn't a good friend, who wasn't a good daughter, a good sister, a good anything for that matter.

The world, the world is a rock, useless, when it doesn't have any purpose, entertaining, however, when it skips on water. A weapon, when used to hurt others. Maybe she was a rock too, not of the beautiful kind, no, just the dull, grey rock, the one with moss, the one no one would ever pick up for anything else but to cause pain to others. She wasn't smooth enough to be the one skipped on the lake, but she was however, purposeless and maybe a weapon, but the one that destroys itself. Like an arrow, that wouldn't aim anything but the archer's chest, or a boomerang maybe, yes a boomerang. She was a girl, the girl and a rock.

Thinking is beneficial, reflecting is greatly beneficial. The wise man thinks. Over - thinking, causes no benefit, however it can not be called nothing, nothing is neutral. Over - thinking is harmful. Like talking the fish called " soul " out of the water.

This girl who was a constant burden on everyone, the sour note in the symphony maybe, she was the daughter who wasn't able to be "the daughter". Yes, the one that's perfect, she wasn't a good thinker, and even not a good person maybe, but she never knew because there was too much doubt now, that doubt had mixed with her determination and truned into something strange. She never felt like she belonged anywhere, her mother, considered her a disappointment and her father, well he was way far from even considering her anything.

She was the sister, the sister of a suspecting brother, the one who never saw her in the right light, the little care he gave her was the very thing that destroyed her and at times she wished it wasn't there, at all. She was the sister of a sister who she knew she had no right to blame, however nature can't be changed. She was the sister of a sister who stole unwantedly and unknowingly everything she had on the very day she came to the world.

I can't stay, I don't belong here, I'm sorry I wasn't able to be the person you wanted me to be. But I will find my way, and someday if you can, please be proud of me.

- Claire

These words constantly played in her mind. She had taken such a big decision but ofcourse there was doubt, where would she go? What would she do? Did she have the strength that it took to go on? Was this the right decision?

She didn't want to think about it, all this insecurity would probably drive her crazy, she banished these thought from her mind, perhaps for sometime, and thought of what was waiting for her ahead.

It was August 15th 2011, two whole days had passed since she left her family and moved on, atleast she thought so, she had no precise destination and no particular aim, she was just going, going and going.

It was a nice sunny day in Eastern Padokia, the clouds were high and bright, and it hadn't rained for a while, even so, the trees and grass were fresh, and everything in the surrounding seemed to radiate positivity and what she needed the most, hope.

It was the afternoon. I took in deep breaths to calm myself, you did right, don't look back. That's what I kept telling myself. Since this morning I had been going through a series of emotions, and right now I felt like crying, it was harder than it seemed to stop those tears from falling. I had no idea what to do or where to go, but if I started crying people would probably stare and freak out. I wanted to shout and run and maybe disappear somewhere into thin air. Well it was worth a shot, that's what I did, like an idiot I started running for no damn reason and well I had to admit it felt pretty good, and yeah, I had always been known for being the poised one, funny.

Bam, ouch! What the...

I rubbed my head, man did that hurt, "Are you ok? Look I'm really sorry, I wasn't looking where I was going and...", I said when I was suddenly interrupted by the spiky haired boy I'd bumped into. "Hey no biggie, it's ok, are you hurt?", he asked politely smiling. "Uh...no, I'm fine", I said, I felt like an idiot.

"I'm Gon, Gon Freecs.", said the boy. He had spiky black hair and big brown eyes. He wore a green pull over, green shorts and boots. He held a fishing rod in one hand and the other hand was held out, he wanted me to shake it.

"Uh...", I said staring like an idiot at his hand. He shook my hand anyway, "And you are..?". "Uh.. Clarisse, Clarisse Gaspardo.", I said as soon as I realized I was making a fool of myself. "Nice to meet you Clarisse, you look bad, are you lost?".

"Call me Claire, and umm.. no I'm not lost, I just don't know where to go." I said, wow nice one I'm not lost but I don't know where to go? You're so smooth.

"Hahahah", the cute spiky haired boy, Gon, laughed. "Where are you going?"

"Well...would I look like a total moron if I said I didn't know that either?", I said smiling sheepishly.

Gon smiled, "No, not like a total moron.", he said, he was a nice guy someone I could get along with very easily.

"This is my friend, Killua.", Gon said as he pointed to the silver haired boy standing next to him, I hadn't even realized he was there. The boy wore a grey shirt and black sweats and had his hands in his pockets, he had beautiful blue eyes, like sapphires, over all this boy was very cute, even pretty if not more.

"Hey", I held my hand out for him, "I'm Claire nice to...", I stopped immediately when I saw he was looking at me with a weird and bored expression.

"Nice to?", he said, looking at me with an arched eyebrow. "Meet you", I gasped, "Nice to meet you.", I had no idea why I just stopped at mid sentence, but yeah, I totally made a fool out of myself, and it was embarassing. One of the stangest things about me was that I did get embarassed alot, but, I never blushed, so it sort of saved me from more humiliation and I was grateful of that.

"The pleasure's all mine.", he said it like a nursery rhyme his parents taught him, and though he hated it, he knew he had to say it.

I heard some people talk around us and then realized that they weren't just some people, there were ALOT of people around us, that was when I came back to reality, I was nowhere near the park I was walking by a few minutes ago, did I run this far? Had I gone crazy or something?

"Where am I?", I asked breathless.

"Heaven's Arena", Gon answered worriedly taking in my weird expression, "Are you ok?".

"Yeah, totally..I just think I'm lost" , Heaven's Arena was one of the main fighting arenas in the world, who didn't know about that? And though I did hear about it alot I didn't know where it was or how I got here. "Do you guys fight?", I blurted out without thinking.

"Umm... yeah.", said Gon smiling, "We're hunters."

"Oh...cool.", I was impressed and now that I carefully looked at both the boys I realized they had well built physiques.

"Yeah, we just finished our work here, we made it to the 200th floor.", he said.

"Wow.", I was speechless, these boys were pros. "Where are you guys going now?"

"To York New City, for the annual auction.", said Gon, a bit freaked out maybe, or maybe that was just my imagination, because who was I to ask that? "What about you? You're lost right? How did you get here in the first place?"

"I, yeah I'm lost and it sounds pretty creepy but I..well, I ran away from home, and I have no idea where I am or where to go.", I smiled apologetically, I was such an idiot.

"Oh, well then you should come with us.", Gon offered.

I was startled, "Wha-what?", I stuttered, and then I realized that the silver haired boy had just repeated what I had said, but with a more hysteric voice.

"Gon...you don't go around and ask lost people, who just ran away from their homes to join us.", he said, he was mad, and I felt sorry I didn't want to cause a fight between these two.

"But Killua, she's nice, and she's lost, what if she gets in trouble or something?", said gon with a concerned voice.

"Well that's not our problem, it's hers", said Killua, did I say he was mad? He was definately mad.

I felt totally embarassed, and if that wan't enough tears started streaming down my cheeks, great, high five. "I'm so sorry, you're right, please don't argue, I just...I think I should get going, bye.", I said wiping the tears off my face, great, I just met two people like five minutes ago and cried infront of them, I was about to run away when someone grabbed my wrist.

"What..let me go.", I said turning around to face Gon, I was surprised when I realized it wasn't Gon who held my wrist, it was Killua.

"Wait, why are you crying?", he said in a firm voice, his beautiful eyes bored into mine.

"I...I don't know...I'm sorry.", I said.

"Why are you apologizing?"

"I...don't, know."

"And is there anything you do know?"

"I...damn it, I do, it's...huh, no."

"Okay, you're staying with us.", he said like he just gave a huge check to an orphanage.

"Wow...thanks, but who said I want to?", I said, I was kind of angry, this boy was so not someone I could get along with.

"I did.", he said smugly.

I tried to free my wrist, man, he had a hard grip. "Let go already.", I said loudly, he was getting on my nerves.

"No.", he said calmly, "I won't, but why don't you make me?"

"I...", I didn't know what to say or do, did he have a brain disorder or something, meeting someone on the way and forcing them to go with you, was this normal?

"Good, so you're staying, come on.", he dragged me by my wrist.

"Like hell I am, let go.", I wanted t shout or cry, he was just too strong.

That was when he glared at me, and heaven knows I never saw anything like it, it was deadly, it took the breath out of me, he had the eyes of a...of a killer, and it terrified me.

Without arguing any further I followed where he lead. I looked to my side to see an apologetic Gon, I sighed, and nodded. What did I just get myself into? I had no damn idea.

It was 7 pm, a light breeze blew my hair lightly to the side. We were at the York Shin airport, waiting for the next flight to York New City. From what I learned about these boys, Gon was professional hunter, he was looking for his dad who left him with his aunt at a very young age, his father was a hunter and was the very one who inspired Gon to become one himself. Curse such parents, how could a father be so selfish? And how the hell could Gon be so excited and happy about his decision, funny, if my parents did something like this I wouldn't want to have anything to do with them, much less try to find them.

Killua was a former assasin from what I've heard from Gon, and he too ran away from home. Yay! Twinsies...I just knew we were going to get along, I just hoped I survived. The thing which surprised me the most was the fact that a boy as bright and friendly as Gon could be best friends with someone so lazy and bored looking, and scary, obviously scary as Killua.

They were heading to York New City for the great annual auction, they were supposed to meet two of their friends there. It was really annoying, stuck with two people I barely knew, one of them who was forcing me to stay and as a plus was completely ignoring me, so cool.

"So.. Claire..", Gon said, we had been chatting for the last two hours and I had to admit Gon was a really fun person, the type you always wanted to be around. "How old are you exactly?."

"Oh... wow, I guess I didn't tell you, I'm thirteen, I'm turning fourteen next april.", I said smiling.

"I hope I'm not being too nosey, but why exactly did you run away?", he said with an apologetic smile.

That question left me completely blank, sort of like being numb, I didn't know what Gon saw on my face but it was enough to make him worry.

"Are you ok? I'm really sorry that's none of my business.", he said hurriedly.

"Uh.. no, I'm fine, and I'm sorry, I will tell you, just... just not right now.", I said as camly and reassuringly as I could. I certainly didn't want to hurt him, he deserved an explanation, ofcourse he did, we were friends, not since long, but we were and for that we needed to trust each other. I just needed time.

We landed in York New City at exact 5 the next morning. I had slept only for two hours and it was hard to keep my eyes open, I felt like I was going to pass out any moment. It was still dark and I'm sure who ever saw me walking probably thought I was drunk or something.

When I woke up I had no idea where I was, or how I got here. The room was small and very comfortable. It had a plain wooden ceiling, white curtains blew with the light breeze that came in from the open windows. The walls were painted a nice cream colour. I was about to pass out again when I heard a light knock on the door.

Must be Gon. "Come in.", I said, and yawned hugely. Talk about manners.

I was surprised to see that instead of Gon the beautiful boy with the blue eyes opened the door.

"Hey.", he said like we were friends since childhood.

"Uh..hey?", I was surprised, did he have mood shifts or something?

"How are you feeling?", what? Was this the same boy who glared at me yesterday?

"Great...are you okay?", talk about being smooth.

"Absolutely, why?", I saw a flash of sadness in his eyes.

"Killua, what's wrong? Did you die or something?"

"No it's...just that well, I'm sorry, I sort of forced you to come with us", sort of?, "You must be really pissed off.", must be?, "I just wanted to ask you if you want me to book you a flight back to Eastern Padokia."

I was totally taken aback, I was surprised, my first opinion of him was that he was a show off, my second opninion of him was that he was jerk, my third opinion of him...well he wasn't such a bad person.

"Killua, don't feel bad seriously, it's totally fine, I had nowhere to go anyway.", I wanted to be totally nice to him from now on, but who knew, he might turn back into his jerky self.

"Okay.", wow it sure took something to convice him.

He was about to close the door when, "Killua wait."

"Yeah?", he seemed sort of happy and surprised.

"Where are we?"

"York Shire, it's next to York New City, we'll get there in a few days."

"Oh, okay.", I don't know absolutely why I did it, but I smiled at him, and as if I wasn't freaked out enough at myself for doing that, he smiled back. What a guy.


	2. Start Overs

Chapter: 2

"Start overs."

I had no idea why I had butterflies in my stomach, come on Claire, he just smiled at you, the queen didn't invite you to tea, chill. I couldn't sleep, so I just took a shower instead. I changed into clean clothes and went out of the room. I found myself in a small hallway, where was I supposed to go? Since I was always really confused, I played it smooth this time, eenie meenie, I ended up going left, there was a small stair case. I went down to see a bored looking Killua having breakfast, even with that look he was absolutely adorable, wait what? What was I thinking, no way.

I went to the table and seated myself next to him. "So...whats up?", wow whats up?

"Um..nothing.", he said, he was talking to the window, not to me.

"Killua, why do you ignore me?", seriously what was his problem, first he acts all sweet and now back to Dr. Jerkyll.

"I don't."

"Why do you pretend that I don't exist?"

"I don't"

"Is there anything that you do?", I asked smirking, I'm sure he remembered those words very well.

His expression changed, his gaze dropped, and then he looked at me, I wish I could always look at his eyes like that, they were so beautiful.

"I.. don't know how to talk to girls.", he admitted, he looked sort of embarassed, I didn't know what to say, he didn't look like the shy type, no way.

He sighed and looked away.

"You don't have to know how to talk to someone, you just do it, I'll give you a hint though, don't ignore them, that never helps."

"I already screwed that up, sort of."

"Well you know what? Let's just start over, like nothing happened, like this is the first time we've met and you didn't harass me back at the heaven's arena ok?"

"I...harassed...you...what?"

"Yeah, you did, totally."

"That's not called harassing."

"Forcing people to do something they don't want to by force? That's harassing, if not more."

"I already said I was sorry."

"And I accepted it, that's why I'm saying let's start over."

"Okay."

"Hey."

"Hey."

"I'm Clarisse, you can call me Claire."

"Hey Claire, I'm Killua, you can call me Killua."

The moment he said my name it sent chills down my spine, like electricity had just passed through me, and I realized it was the first time he ever said it.

"Wow, such a privilege, I'm sure only a few get to call you that."

"Yeah, most people call me Killua Zoldyck."

I gasped. He was a Zoldyck, no doubt he had those killer eyes. He was former assasin, that's what Gon told me, how could I have not guessed?

"So you're the son that ran away?"

"The very one."

I'm sure he expected me to ask him something about his family and his former life, but that was the least of my interests.

"What's your favourite colour?"

"Wha...what?"

"What? I just asked you what's you favourite colour." I so knew he was going to react this way. It made me feel sort of smug.

"Black and green.", he said, he was definately surprised by my question, but answered like it was well memorized scientific definition or something.

Black and green, black suited his personality it was... dark, just like his jerky side. Green... green was fresh, peaceful maybe the the self he was when he wasn't a jerk, yes these two colours suited him very well.

"You there?", he said waving his hand infront of my face.

"Uh..yeah, what?"

"I asked you what your favourite colour was?"

"You?...Me? Uh...Blue."

"Which shade?"

"The one of your eyes, it's beautiful.", I blurted out without thinking.

He gasped, then he smirked.

What? No! If I could blush I would be seven shades of red.

"No.. I don't, that was the..."

"So...that's why you.."

"Good morning.", Gon said as he was decending the stairs.

God! That was such a lucky blow.

"Good morning.", I said back relief thick in my voice.

"Hey.", said Killua as casually as possible.

Gon went to the kitchen and grabbed a bowl, he was making cereal for himself.

I made a huge mistake and turned my gaze to Killua, he was smirking, he blinked, and showed me the full glory of his wonderful eyes.

I rolled my eyes and turned away. Could someone be so irritating? Jerk.

It was 12 pm, Gon said they were waiting for one of their friends, Leorio-san, they wanted to collect some money for the annual auction and Leorio-san was an expert in money matters, except that, well, that was what I heard. The four friends parted before Gon and Killua went to the Heaven's Arena to continue their training. Leorio was a medical student, a doctor, while their other friend Kurapika...well, they just said he was already in York New City.

To be honest I was excited to meet Leorio-san. I loved the medical field, before running away from home I had studied two years of professional biology and if I didn't have anything better to do I intended to continue my studies as soon as I got the chance, maybe he'd help me even.

At fixed 12:15 the door bell rang. Killua opened the door revealing a tall man, with long spiky hair, he wore glasses and looked like he was 30 or something, I was surprised, I expected that Gon and Killua's friend would be somewhat close to my age. He walked inside, he had long legs and I had to admit, he wasn't the charming type.

"Leorio-san!", Gon shouted bursting my ear drums as soon a he saw the tall man's figure.

"Gon! Killua and... who's this..?, he looked at me in a manner that was anything but decent.

Killua nodded and said, "Old man this is Claire, just a refugee we found on the streets."

I didn't know what to say, I was anything but okay, I had nothing to say, I wanted to punch Killua on the face, and cry, yes, I deperately wanted to cry.

"Hey, Claire, nice to meet you.", the tall man, Leorio, smiled politely.

"Pleasure's mine.", I said smiling back.

I glared at Killua as soon as I got the chance, and instead of feeling the least bit apologetic, he smirked, JERK.

Leorio was a really interesting person, and the exact kind of guy I imagined, I told him about my interest in studies and he was so the guy that could help me out, the good news was that I could continue the studies and travel with these boys too, I only had to settle down for a week in York New City at the time of the exams. The surprising fact about Leorio was that he was a teenager, well atleast that's what he said. He was a nice man, easy to talk to.

"Zepile.", said Leorio,"He's a friend of mine, great businessman, I'm sure he can get you the required money in no time."

"I hope so", said Killua,"Because the online prices of that game aren't cheap."

"Game?", I asked surprised, they were after a game?

"Yeah, Greed Island, it's a very costly game, it's somehow related to Gon's father, we're trying to get a hold of it.", Killua said, he looked straight into my eyes.

"Oh..", I was surprised, he wasn't ignoring, and he wasn't even being a jerk, wow another mood shift?

Zepile-san was a brown haired tall man, and he was kind of scary looking, his eyebrows were ruffled and he looked like anything but a business man, he was the perfect representation of the quote "don't judge a book by its cover.", his legs were longer than Leorio's. I did notice people's legs alot, that made me realize I'd never noticed Killua's, they were firm, and just the right size, they were perfect, so was he...except for his mood shifts...what? It was impossible, I couldn't like this over confident and annoying boy.

"I don't like him.", I was sure. Or was I?

"Who?", Killua asked

Did I just say that out loud? "No one."

"Man, you like me so much you can't even admit it to your self.", he smirked.

I hated it so much when he smirked, but actually he looked really cute. No! Stop! I had no intentions of arguing with my self or him, and beside there was nothing to argue about, I did like him.

"You're right", I said , smirking, "I do like you."

He gasped, he didn't expect such a response. "Wow, I'm surprised, you do have good taste."

"Yeah, maybe, but come on Killua, we both don't want me to say it like this, right?"

He narrowed his eyes and smirked, "You're right, I like you too Claire."

We both smiled, "Let's start over.", we both said in unison.

Bah! 8 am, my alarm rang. I looked around me confused. I was in bed, oh, thank god, just a dream. Chill.


	3. Nen

Chapter: 3

"Nen."

"Why exactly am I supposed to stay home?", I asked annoyed.

"Because..if you came you'd only cause us trouble.", said Killua who was back to his jerk mode.

"Wow, funny, I thought that was your job.", I felt like punching him.

"Stay."

"Why..?"

"You're safe here, stay we'll be back in no time, I don't wanna be worried about you the whole time, understood?", he said it the softest tone possible.

Wow another mood shift, how could he turn so damn sweet? "Okay."

"That's like a good girl, watch TV or something 'til we come back."

"Cool."

"Cool."

I was absolutely in no mood to watch TV, I lied down on the couch trying to pass out for a while, but my head was so filled with Killua, it was hard to sleep. What an amazing, idiotic and annoying boy, I met him like a day ago and I even started dreaming about him. Nice one.

I went to the kitchen trying to find something to eat, I realized I didn't ask Killua whose appartment this was. Killua still had no damn reason to leave me alone at home while they went to examine the goods for the auction, what kind of people leave a defenseless little girl alone at home?

I went back to the room I slept in. There was absolutely nothing to do, I went to the bathroom and splashed water on my face, I turned to the mirror, chocolate brown hair, matching eyes, long eye lashes, I was pretty much the same except that my lips were a bit swollen. I went through all the things that had happened to me in the past three days. I ran away from home leaving my family with nothing but a goodbye note, I ended up in a city miles away from home, bumped into two boys, hunters, along the way and now I was in their apartment even more miles away from home. I wondered if my mother transfered some money into my bank account, I was sure she did. I was scarce on clothes, all I had brought with me was a small bag, and it didn't have much stuff in it. I needed to take a trip down to the bank as soon as I got the chance.

I took my phone out from my bag. I switched it on, I took out the sim card before I left the house, I was sure my mother would try to track me down, I had to be careful. I flipped through my photos, then got bored again. Somewhere in the middle of boredom I fell asleep on the floor.

"Hey, sleeping beauty, you're not getting a kiss, wake up."

"Say..I'm, when?"

Killua giggled at my words.

"Come on, I'm sure you're not sleepy anymore, let's go down stairs."

"Oh..I fell asleep?"

"Um..no you just came back from a ride on a unicorn over a magical rainbow."

"Ha ha, funny."

"Come, on."

"Kay."

We went down stairs everyone was sitting in a circle, like it was meeting arrangement. I sat next to Gon.

"I haven't seen you in a while.", I said

He smiled at me, "You won't believe who we saw today."

"Try me."

"The phantom troupe."

"The phantom what?"

"Huh...Gon how's she supposed to know?", Killua interjected. "It's sort of a gang, they kill."

"Like, like assasins?"

"Yeah, sort of, they're also called the spider, I'm surprised you never heard of them, they've killed millions.", Gon said with a serious expression, I never saw him this way.

"They're in the city, what do you think they're upto old man?", Killua looked worried, these spider people really must have been a threat.

"No idea.", Leorio said, he was way busy flipping through the pages of a not so appropriate magazine.

"There's an auction in the next city right? They must be here for that.", I said while I was drumming my fingers on the floor.

When I looked up I met three pairs of widened eyes.

"Wha-what? I was just suggesting that."

"Why the hell didn't I think of that?", said Killua, suprise thick in his voice.

"I-a."

"You're a genius.", said Gon smiling.

"I am?"

"Totally."

"If they're here for the auction there must be some serious stuff they're giving off over there.", Killua was way worried about this.

"Did you guys find the things you needed?", I asked suddenly remebering.

"Uh, yeah, some, we still need more money, the one's we got today were all thanks to Zepile-san.", said Gon gratefully.

"Really?"

"Yeah. Me and Killua used Gyo, some of the objects had nen in them and they were really valuable, Zepile-san knew the prices so he helped us out."

"Gyo..? Nen..?"

"Oh, you don't know about nen?"

"Am...I...supposed to?"

"Well, you're not a hunter so I guess not."

"Tell me, I wanna know anyway.", I pressed, he didn't look like he felt like explaining.

"Uhh.. I really don't know the whole explanation thingy.", Gon said apologetically."But I think Killua can tell you.", he said hopefully looking at Killua.

"Nah, don't feel like it.", said Killua with the most bored expression he had shown yet, like he was shooing me away or something.

"Pretty please.", I said blinking my eyes at him.

"What do I get in return?"

"Well... what do you want?"

"Umm, okay wait I'll explain to you what Nen is, then I'll tell you what I want later.", he said with a devilish grin.

"You're creeping me out but okay.", I said doubtfully.

"Okay listen carefully.", he coughed like it was switch to turn his serious side on."Nen means mind force. The word "Nen" can also be used in conversation to refer to aura. Aura is the life energy produced by all living bodies vital for survival. Aura from all parts of the body has a tendency to flow together, producing one mass of energy. This happens without the individual's awareness, typically resulting in a slow leak of aura continually escaping the body. If one were to lose their entire aura, it would be equivalent to using up all the energy keeping them alive, which would be fatal. The pores or points on the body from which aura flows out from are called "Aura Nodes", controlling these nodes is the first step to being a nen user."

I was left with my mouth open, he was always able to surprise me. How could a boy his age know this much and be so mature? "Wow.", I said.

"Don't interrupt, and listen carefully."

"Okay, okay sorry."

"Learning to use Nen is the final step in becoming a professional Hunter because most contracted jobs require the use of it as the minimum requirement. The technique has the ability to enhance the strength of physical attacks or objects depending on the quantity of aura employed and an individual's aura type, as well as allows for para-psychological abilities to exist in reality. Because one can craft just about any sort of psychic power through only using their mind, Nen is also a dangerous power unknown to the public at large, there are basically six types of nen users. Manipulators, Enhancers, Transmutters, Specialists, Conjurers and Emitters this is determined by water divination."

"What are you two?"

"I said don't interrupt, I will tell you."

I dropped my gaze to the floor. I felt really embarassed, and I would flush, if I could.

"There are four major principles of Nen, Ten, Zetsu, Ren and Hatsu. Ten is the process of keeping the aura nodes open, Zetsu stops the flow of aura from the body altogther, Ren is the direct application of Ten, it allows the user to produce more aura around their body, Hatsu is the release or transmission of one's aura so it can be projected to carry out a certain function. Understood?"

"Yeah."

"Good, well that's all.", he said and turned his face to the window.

"Wait..what? Aren't you going to teach me how to use it?", I asked shocked.

"Umm..no, why would I do that?", he asked as if I was a mentally retarded person.

"Because I want to."

He sighed, "Okay", he signaled me to come forward with his hand.

I stood up and sat infront of him. He raised two fingers and brought them to my forehead. I was so excited, Killua was about to teach me Nen, and...he was so close.

Thump!

"Wha-what the?"

Killua had just pushed my head backwards with his fingers and I had no idea what was going on, my head was spinning and Gon and Leorio were laughing. As soon as I got control of my head, I looked at Killua he was grinning, an evil grin. "Why did you do that?", I asked, I was furious.

"Cause I wanted to.", he repeated my words, smirking, "And it was funny."

"Ha ha, very.", I was annoyed and I felt like crying, again. "I'm going to bed.", I announced, frustrated and I felt really humiliated, there was no bigger jerk on the planet than Killua, and I never wanted to see his face again, if this was how he really was, then I didn't want to have anything to do with him, not now, not ever.

I sank my face in the pillow, it was nearly 2 am, my body had no intentions of falling asleep. Killua could just go to hell if he wanted to, there wasn't going to be any attempt to talk to him from my part, ever.

Someone lightly knocked the door, I gasped, I was caught off guard. "Come in", I said just louder than a whisper, who the hell would want to come in my room in the middle of the night?

Killua opened the door as quietly as he could. "Get out!", I wisper shouted as soon as I saw his face.

"Shh.", he said like he was shushing baby who was asking for his mother.

"What do you want?"

He put his finger to his lips telling me to keep quiet. He had something in his hands he was holding very carefully. He closed the door and moved to the further end of the room, he put the object down and turned on the lights. It was a cup.

"Come here.", he said looking tenderly in my eyes.

"No way, go away.", I said, folding my arms on my chest like a stubborn child.

"I said come here, and I won't say it again."

I froze at his commanding and scary tone, it reminded me of the time at heaven's arena. Without further argument I got off the bed and sat next to him on the floor. The cup he put on floor was filled with water and it had leaf floating on top of it.

"What's this?", I asked unable to hide the curiosity in my voice.

He smiled, "This is called water divination, we're going to find what nen user type you are."

"What? Are you serious? No, wait, are you messing with me again?"

"No, damn it, no, I'm not."

"Okay."

"Stay very still, I'm going to try to open your aura nodes, avoid making any types of sounds please."

"Okay."

He lifted his hand and put his palm straight infront of my face. "Here goes."

I felt a type of breeze coming from his hand, it was pleasant until it went wild and took the breath out of me, I felt like my body was going numb, or maybe it was feeling too much, like air rushing in and out of my body, it was hard to explain. I pressed my lips tight together trying not to make any noise. After sometime the wind stopped, I felt wild, frenzy even maybe. I felt this new energy in my body, it was amazing, I had no words to describe it, it drove me crazy.

"What? What am I now?", I asked dazzed, I felt crazy.

Killua laughed in a whisper.

"Okay, now stay still."

I did as I was told. He put the cup infront of me.

"Put your hands around the cup and perform Ren, you remember what I told you right?"

I nodded.

I put my hands around the cup and tried to concentrate the aura around my hands. Nothing, nothing happened. I tried again, harder, still nothing.

"What? Why?", I was shocked, something was supposed to happen and it didn't, was there something wrong with me? I dropped my gaze disappointed.

Killua put his index finger inside the cup and then put it to his mouth.

"Transmuter.", he mumbled.

"Eh?", I tasted the water myself, it was sweet, no maybe, sour?

"You're a transmuter.", he said as he saw my confused expression, "I am one too."

"What? Really?", I asked excited, somehow the fact that we both were the same type of nen users excited me and it was too late to hide that excitement from Killua.

He smirked, "Gon's an enhancer.", I thought he would tease me for good but his response totally surprised me.

"Oh..", I took a deep breath and felt the aura around me, I could feel his too. "Thank you Killua.", I said hiding my face in my hands.

"Anytime."

I peeked at him face through my hands, he was staring at me. What now? Was I supposed to say good night? Or maybe invite him to stay, wouldn't that be weird?

"Want some tea?", he asked as casually as he could manage.

"Umm..yeah, tea...sounds great."

We went downstairs. It was sort of funny, someone as stubborn and annoying as Killua could ask someone for tea, and it was surprising that he could even make tea, it was embarassing because I myself didn't know how to make it. I never had been great at cooking, or you could say I never cooked a day in my life.

While gulping down the amazing tea he made we stayed completely silent, I was on the couch, while he stood next to the table. He was staring out of the window, he looked..thoughtful.

"What are you thinking about?"

No response.

"Killua?"

Still nothing.

"Damn it, Killua, what the hell are you thinking about?"

"Uhm? What? Nothing.", he looked disoriented around himself. "You should probably go to bed."

And that was it, that was all the nice Killua version I was going to get tonight, taking it as my cue to leave, I got off the couch and headed to my room.

"Claire, wait.", Killua called from below.

My heart started beating faster for no damn reason, "Yeah?", I asked excited and breathless.

"Keep practicing the water divination, until the water changes completely in taste okay?"

"Uh..yeah, sure.", I said, trying to hide the disappointment in my voice.

Tomorrow was going to be a long day.


	4. The Phantom Troupe

Chapter: 4

"The Phantom Troupe."

"I need to go outside.", I told Killua as I was practicing my water divination.

"And why exactly is that?", he put his finger in the water and tasted it,"Uhm, still not there."

"I need to take some money from my bank account, I need clothes and a sim card, and how much more do you want me to try? It totally changed in taste.", I said as I put my hands around the cup again.

"Why do you need those things for? You don't need money, you're already wearing clothes and who exactly do you need to call? And that's not enough", he said putting his hands around the cup,"It should taste like this.", he removed his hands and pointed towards the cup telling me to taste it.

"Wow I need to tell you why I need money? And you expect me to spend the rest of my life in the same clothes? And I'm not calling anyone, I just need a sim card.", I said as I put my finger in the water and tasted it, "You don't under..", I gasped. The water tasted like honey, no, maybe even sweeter if that was possible.

He smirked, he seemed smug.

"Okay, so I'll keep trying, anyway I was saying..the bank?"

"Um, kay."

I stood up, "Come on, then."

"What, like right now?", he asked as if I said something shameless.

"No, on the day of you're wedding, now get up."

"Uh..you're so stubborn, hey Gon! Come on."

It was nearly 3pm when we entered the Cafe next to the shopping mall, in the town square.

"I'm so thirsty, I think I'm gonna die.", Gon said as soon as we sat down.

Killua ordered three drinks for us. The waitress examined him head to toe with an unnecessary smile.

"If miss "I wanna go shopping" here", Killua said as soon as the waitress went away, "Didn't take three hours picking out clothes we would already be home by now."

"Not my fault", I said raising my hands,"I asked for your opinion and you two didn't help."

"We're boys", Killua said moving his hand in the space between him and Gon, "We don't know about girls' clothes."

The waitress came with our drinks.

"Here.", Killua said reaching for something in his pocket, he took out a rectangular figure.

"Oh.", I said taking the sim card he handed me, "Thanks Killua."

"You can never thank me enough.", he said with a smug expression.

"Wow talk about being modest, and you.."

"Shh."

I watched Killua with my eyes wide open. He was staring to his side with a serious expression. I turned to where his gaze was fixed. I saw a pink haired lady with a messy ponytail, she had a deadly expression on her face. Next to her was sitting a black haired man with a long pony tail and a thin mustache, they both looked creepy.

"Is that?"

"Yeah.", Killua interrupted my question,"That's the phantom troupe."

Gon was watching them wide eyed, but yet his expression was cautious.

"Act normal, Claire stop freaking out."

"Uh..Yeah sorry.", my palms were all sweaty, I didn't know what to do.

We played it cool for a while, trying to act like we were talking while Killua was keeping an eye on them. Both of the phantom troupe members stood up. I froze. What now?

"Come on.", Killua wispered his eyes never leaving the two spiders.

Me and Gon both stood up.

"Now listen very carefully", Killua said with the most serious glare I ever saw, go on zetsu, and we're following them, try not to catch their attention, got it?"

"Yeah.", me and Gon both said in unison.

We were a few meters away from the square now, we couldn't see the two phantom troupe members but the distance was not too much for us to follow them. Killua turned his gaze to Gon and he nodded.

Then all of a sudden Gon rushed away to the side, and he was on the roof of the closest building. I gasped. I turned to Killua, his eyes were on the path ahead. For a fraction of a second he turned his gaze to me, his eyes were serious, cautious and deadly. He took my hand and dragged me forward. I could see Gon on the roof ahead, I hoped they didn't notice us, I was sure these people were serious trouble. I couldn't believe myself, we were in this deadly situation and yet my heart was pounding because Killua held my hand, it was stupid, I was such an idiot.

We followed them a long way and they didn't seem to notice. What was going on? Where were they leading us? This was a completely deserted construction area. Was this where they're base was? I had no idea. Killua and I entered an under constuction building, it smelled strongly of fresh cement. I could hear footsteps, was Gon in the building too? Killua led to a window hole, we both ducked and watched the two members as they stood in the center of the area looking around themselves.

"Why did they stop?", Killua whispered in his phone.

"No idea.", Gon answered back.

What now? This was weird? Were they waiting for someone? Both the troupe members turned their gaze to exactly where we were. We froze. That was when it all clicked in my head. They weren't the ones being followed, we were, and this was trap.

The things that happened in the next moment were all so sudden they left me dizzy. Killua put his hands under my legs and carried me to the side of the room. Hell, I saw her or him, it was along silver haired something, a lady maybe? I could feel the aura around it. It was scary. The thing charged forward in a blur, Killua was fast enough to save us from the blow and turn to the side, but boy were we in for a surprise, as soon as we turned it was infront of us. A hand appeared out of nowhere cluching Killua's arm tightly.

"No!", I yelled, I was so confused, what was I supposed to do?

Blood started oozing from Killua's arm, the thing had a very tight grip and Killua had alot of tolerence for pain, how could someone not scream at that? The one thing no one knew about me and I didn't want anyone to know was that I had Haemophobia. I froze at the sight of blood, it was so close, a few drops freshly falling on my hand that gripped Killua's shoulders. The corners of the room started blurring away.

"Stop!", I heard Killua's voice, it wasn't clear, what was going to happen now? "We give up."

Those were the last words I heard before faiting completely.

My eyes started to prick, my head felt like it weighed a hundred pounds, I felt like I had just run a thousand miles, or maybe jumped from a skyscraped. I peeked through my eye lashes, Killua. He looked so beautiful it was breath taking. His expression was serious, he looked straight ahead, his blue eyes were solid, sharp but they didn't have the deadly glare.

"People like you shouldn't even exist, you feel sorry for yourself, but not for the one's you've killed, how dare you feel sorry for your friend? How dare you say you will avenge him?", I heard Gon's desperate voice, he wasn't talking, no, he wasn't arguing, he was shouting.

I came to my senses. Where was I? The phantom troupe.. the thing... blood... Killua. I gasped and lifted myself up.

"Killua.", I said breathlessly.

"I'm here, chill out, couldn't you stay put for a while?"

I realized I was in Killua's lap. I felt like exploding if not more. He smelled like musk and chocolate. I wanted to stay here forever, look into his beautiful eyes and maybe get lost somewhere in the middle of that.

Killua coughed, and pointed ahead of him. I turned my head to the side, Gon, tears in his eyes, his hand firmly gripping another's, an arm wrestling match? I saw the man, he was the same creepy guy with the little mustache we saw in the cafe. The creepy guy was crying, his eyes watching with fury, but at the same time with astonishment Gon's. Gon's hand started bleeding, they gripped each other's hand with that much force. I couldn't watch, no, no more blood. I covered my eyes with my hands and tried to chase the image of the bleeding hands away from my head, I didn't want to pass out another time.

"Are you okay?", Killua wispered lightly into my ear, his voice was full of concern.

"Yeah... I think so."

"What happened back there?"

Gon and the man were arguing, louder than before.

"Nothing."

"Tell me."

I sighed, "It's the blood, it freaks me out.", I mumbled, "Is Gon still bleeding?"

"Yeah, don't look."

I suddenly remembered the wound he got back at the construction area. "Killua, what happened to.. is your arm fine?"

"Yeah.", I was about to cock my head to the side when his hand blocked my view, "But don't look."

"Okay.", I sighed. "Where are we?"

"They're base I guess, they're waiting for their boss, they say they're going to let us go after that."

"Hey, you two, stop talking or else.", a rough but at the same time velvet voice said.

It was a man with black spicky hair, pointing in every direction, the collar of his kimono covered his face upto his nose, all that was visible were his eyes, and they were deadly. We shut up at once. I couldn't look at Gon, I didn't want to look at my surroundings it would probably just freak me out, so instead I carefully watched Killua's face, as his expressions changed while he watched Gon, the liquid sapphire of his eyes was solid, with worry and concern but he still looked breath taking. He turned his gaze to mine and looked at me with a serious expression, his face was so close to mine, I wanted to lean in, forget that we were surrounded by a gang of deadly assasins and feel the warmth and beauty of his lips. He turned his gaze to Gon. Everyone else was silent, Gon and the mustache man were still having a fight.

"Shut up Gon!", Killua yelled in anger, he was holding it back from a while. "Shut your damned mouth!"

Gon stopped talking, I wondered what expression he had. I wanted to look but gave up on the idea, it was better not to know than to know and pass out.

"We're leaving", I heard a female's voice. "Nobunaga let these kids go, why would the boss want to see them anyway."

"The boss might like them, maybe they'll join.", said Nobunaga.

"I'd rather go to hell than..", Gon started furiously.

"Shut up Gon!", Killua looked like he wanted to strangle his best friend, his eyes were murderous with rage.

"You watch over them, then. Stay here until the boss comes, we're leaving.", the woman said.

"Okay.", Nobunaga's tone was excited, "This should be fun."

It was minutes later, Gon, Killua and I were sitting at the further end of a stony room. Nobunaga was sitting at the other end, with a wild and serious expression. One of his arms was placed elbow wise on his raised knee while the other arm was dropped to a side cluthing his metal sword. Brightly lit candles surrounded him, was this a ceremony or something? I looked to both my sides watching a serious and thoughful Killua and a half mad and half cautious Gon. I sighed, what was going to happen next? All of a sudden Killua stood up, I could feel the malicious aura he was emanating. I froze, what the hell was he about to do?

Nobunaga smiled and stood. "Bring it.", he was thirsty for a challenge.

"Killua, what are you doing?", Gon's voice was worried.

"I'm gonna charge at him, Gon take Claire and get away."

I gasped, "What the hell, don't you dare, I...", my voice was desperate.

"Shut up.", Killua interrupted me all of a sudden. "Get the hell out of here."

He took a few steps forward, I felt like my heart was going to stop all of a sudden.

"Killua, try to reason, if you're gonna get you're self killed, what chance is there the two us might escape? He's strong enough to take ten of us, and we're only three, sit down."

Killua froze, his hands were clutched in tights fists, his knuckles were white. I took his hands, my thumbs drew circles on the back of them, trying to soothe him. He sat down. He looked like he was going to explode any moment.

Nobunaga threw a deadly glare in our direction and sat back down.

"Killua!", Gon's voice was full of relief and joy, but it was just louder than a wisper.

"What.", Killua spoke like he was haunted by death.

Gon smiled. "Remember what Zepile-san taught us?"

"What?", Killua was slightly more interested.

Gon raised his middle, index and thumb, indicating the number three. He dropped the first finger, then the second and just before dropping the third he said "Side-stepping.", and grinned widely.

Killua gasped. "How could I...", and then he closed his eyes and shook his head smiling. "Okay, come on, let's do it.", Killua turned to me. "Close your eyes and enjoy the ride.", he said smiling.

He raised his hands palms upwards infront of him, inviting me to hopp aboard. I put my arms around his shoulders and then pushed my legs on his arms. Both Gon and Killua stood to each other's side. Nobunaga stood once again, with a devilish grin, and if eyes could kill... Both Gon and Killua stepped forward.

"Are you really doing this?", Nobunaga was surprised yet excited.

Another step forward, Nobunaga's body stiffened. All of a sudden Gon and Killua both took charge at full speed, Nobunaga drew his sword. I closed my eyes and tucked my face in Killua's shoulder, this was way too much excitement for my blood. What did these two boys have in mind? All of a sudden there was crash, like Killua's body hit the wall, I didn't turn to see, I was way too freaked out to look, all I heard and felt were explosions and crashes, what the hell was going on? I could here Nobunaga's screams and threats but that was all, I knew if my curiousity got the better of me I would probably end up throwing up or something. Instead I focused on Killua's scent, musk, leather, chocolate, perfection.

"Killua!", Gon called out from somewhere in the middle of nowhere."You out?"

Killua was running, "Yeah, OUT!", he yelled back, breathless but full of relief.

It was ten minutes later, we were running back to town, I exhaled deep breaths, the blood was pounding in my head.

"It's Kurapika.", Killua yelled breathlessly while running. "He's the chain user."

The chain what?

"What? How do you know that?", Gon yelled back surprised.

"Come on Gon, he's got a grudge against the troupe, recently joined the Nostrad's.", Killua seemed confused yet determined.

What was going on? I had absolutely no idea. Who was the troupe? Except that they were a gang of deadly and hearless people, I knew nothing about them. Who was Kurapika, the chain user? I was blank on that page too. Who was Gon Freecs? My crazy and out going best friend who always found the right solution at the right time, except that, I knew nothing about him. Who was Killua Zoldyck? Except the fact that I was falling for him and that he was perfect, I knew nothing about him either.


	5. I Killed A Person

Chapter: 5

"I Killed A Person."

The world is based on luck and chance. Some get their way through easily, others struggle. Struggle leaves a mark, it either makes the person strong, or it leaves a hollow in their chest. You can't count the stars, you can't hold water and you certainly can't tame life, but, you can write your own story and that very power gives you the chance to tame millions.

It was nearly 8pm, the three of us were at the subway station. My hand was cluthing tightly Killua's, I felt like I would throw up or faint at any damn moment. I looked around me, I felt like we were being watched, my heart was pounding at the speed of light. What had we just gone through? The cab stopped at a few meters from out feet. The doors opened. My feet were frozen, my brain and body were somehow disconnected and I couldn't order myself forward. Killua dragged me into the cab, Gon was standing to his other side. Killua's hand dropped mine as soon as we stood by the door, at that second I felt hysteric, like crying, or screaming maybe, but he slid his arm around my waist, and my heart completely stopped. I tried my best to control the tears and sobs that were begging me to let them out

It had been nerly twenty minutes we stepped in the cab, all of a sudden it stopped.

"Attention passengers, the scheduled arrival times have been changed due to technical problems in York New City, please wait patiently inside the cab until we receive further orders, please do not exit the cab, these precautions have been taken for your safety.", a woman's soft voice said through the cab speakers.

Killua and Gon nodded at each other, taking me along with him he tried to push the cab doors open, but they were locked. Without wasting any time they walked to the other end of the cab, my arms tighlty clutched Killua's shirt. I knew I had a hysteric expression on my face, people watched me with shocked and terrified faces. Killua glared around him once, all the spectators turned their eyes elsewhere. Once we reached the back end of the cab, Gon kicked the side window open, Killua slid his arm beneath my legs and jumped out of the cab carrying me. He didn't put me back on my feet, I guess he knew just how bad I was feeling, or maybe it was just so obvious on my face. I tucked my face in his shoulder and lightly sobbed.

"Shh.", he whispered while running,"You're fine, no one's going to hurt you, I'm here with you, I won't let anyone."

That set my heart on fire, it was beating too fast, how could he always make me feel this way, no matter the situation we were in?

We were out of the subway tunnel, I could feel it, the wind lightly brushed the sweaty back of neck.

"Call him.", Killua ordered Gon.

I lifted my head to look. Gon took his cell phone, it was shaped like a beetle, out of his pocket and dialed some digits. I could hear the several beaps. All I heard now was buzzing, someone was talking from the othr side of the line.

"Kurapika, hey, it's me Gon.", Gon paused he listened to the buzzes I heard, "No, actually it's really important, please listen.", Gon paused and took a deep breath. "We saw the troupe today, actually, we followed them and got kidnapped by them.", another pause, the buzzing started and it was louder than before. "We know you're the chain user, yes, we need to learn how to use nen from you.", the buzzing was faster."No we..", "No please don't..", I heard the final beep and that was it.

"He's mad", Gon said with a sad expression, "He says he's busy, and that he'll call back later."

Killua's jaw tightened. He set me on my feet and snatched Gon's cell phone from his hand. He dialed some digits, again the beeps.

Killua's eyes were sparkling with fury. As soon as the beeps stopped he started talking, or shouting maybe. "Hey, listen! We aren't joking around here!", he didn't bother with greetings or with manners at all. "They captured us, yeah, we followed.", he said answering the buzzing. "One of them cried infront of us okay?", I thought I saw tears in Killua's eyes."He was crying for his buddy, yeah the mate you killed, they're after you! We're trying to help you here, not get in your way, but if you're just going to ignore us and go on your own then do it, don't bother listening!", he snapped the phone shut and handed it to Gon. "Let's go home."

It was past 10pm when we enetered the apartment. And the sight of a drunk Leorio laughing with an over dozed Zepile sort of left us with out mouths open. Leorio's cheeks were flushed, all sort of wrappers were spread on the floor. It was a weird and disguisting sight.

"Come, kids come, care to join us for a toast?", Leorio was shameless.

"Oye, old man, we're thirteen, we don't drink.", Killua tried to mask the anger in his voice.

"Suit yourself.", Leorio said like we just refused the world's treasures.

"Say aren't you only sixteen yourself? You're underage for drinking you know."

Leorio's expression changed, age was not one of his favourite topics. "Silly boy.", he said waving his hand, "In my country you're allowed to drink when your fifteen.", he smirked, a smug type of smirk.

"You should be ashamed of yourself, you know?", Killua's expression was sarcastic.

"And why would that be?", Leorio raised his eyebrows.

"While you and Zepile were busy having toasts, we three here.", he waved his hand between us, "Followed, and we're kidnaped by the phantom troupe."

"Let by gones be by gones!", Leorio said with a cheerful expression. "That's water under the bridge now!"

Killua rolled his eyes. Gon went to sit on the floor next to the two drunk men and strated nibbling on some snacks.

I knew I was going to burst at any moment so I said a quiet "goodnight", and ran to my room. I had no idea why I was crying this much, Gon and Killua were safe, everyone was safe, they both got hurt, but it wasn't so bad, was it? I splashed my face with water, my eyes were completely red, and the sobs were unstoppable. Someone knocked on my door. I hurriedly dried my face with a towel and went to my bed. "Come in."

I knew it was Killua and I was grateful it was too. He locked the door behind him and sat next to me on the bed. My face was enclosed in my hands and my sobs were louder than before. He slid his arm around my shoulder and crashed me into his chest, I gripped his shirt and started crying letting all the tears escape, I felt sorry that I was ruining his shirt, but I couldn't get myself to stop.

"Shh.", he lighly whispered as his hand drew circled on my back.

"I don't know why I'm crying", I said, my voice broke at the end. "It's just..", I sobbed, "It was horrible.."

"I know.", he burried his face in my hair.

"I thought..", I didn't know how to go on,"I thought I would lose you back there.", my voice wasn't louder than a whisper.

"You didn't", he said, I faced him, he was smiling. He looked, breath taking. "And you won't, ever."

It was awkward, how I was telling what I felt for him so easily, and he was anwering me back in the same manner. Maybe this was the confidence desperation gave, and maybe this was just two annoying and stubborn people like us needed, to be desperate.

I raised my head to face him. My gaze locked to his. His eyes were full of concern and frimness. Without further thought I leaned in, forgetting what happened, and not caring if he would answer or not. My lips touched his ever so lightly, and they didn't feel like I imagined them, they were better. I couldn't stop my body from crashing into his, my brain had no control over my emotions, and right now all I felt was him. My heart pounded and I got back to my senses, he wasn't kissing me back, I drew myself back, knowing that this kiss only added another wound to my heart. Just as my lips were about to leave his, his hand gripped my hair and drew me forward, he was answering, he was kissing me back. His lips rushed against mine, but they were gentle. His hand moved from my hair and cupped my chin, I never felt anything like this before, this was beyond description. I broke the kiss gasping for air, how could something feel so good? His thumb caressed my cheeck very lightly, and then our lips collided once again. He ended the kiss with a light peck, and his lips moved upward and he kissed my forehead.

We both drew back. His breathing was heavy, he was looking at his hands. I stood up.

"I should get some water.", I said brethless.

"Uh.. Yeah.", he blushed lightly, and it was the cutest thing I had ever seen.

My cheeks felt hot and I was burning, my blood was boiling, it was too much to take. Thank God I couldn't blush.

We both got out of the room. He headed for the balcony, I went to the kitchen. What just happened? We both had no idea.

September 6th 2011. The auction was still on, but all the massacre that had been done by the troupe at the auction building was not something people were going to forget easily. It was a disaster, so much blood was spilled, but at the end it was informed that the corpses of some of the troupe members were found, among which the most important one was Chorollo Lucifer's, the boss, the brain, the heart of the spider.

"So you're friend Kurapika managed to kill one of the troupe members?", I asked astonished as I watched TV with Killua.

"Yeah."

"So, like, they don't know that, they just know he uses chains?", It was hard to accept the fact that one of Killua's friends was able to kill one of those freaks.

"UmmHm."

"And one of them can read minds? Did she read yours?"

"Yeah."

"Well then why didn't she find out that you're friend was the chain user?"

"I didn't know it at first myself, but then all the pieces fell into place, and gladly she didn't check our minds a second time."

"Woah."

I started nibbling on a cookie, I was so bored. Today Kurapika was supposed to meet us here. Man, he must be a powerful guy. I imagined him in my head. Tall, muscular, scary looking, with chains tied to his back. Freaky.

Gon was playing chess with Leorio, everyone had something to do except me. Annoying. I started going through memories just for something to do, but the only one that came into my mind and stayed... the kiss. It was out of this world, I had been thinking about it for the past three days, craving more, but I had to banish such thoughts from my mind. Who knew, maybe Killua thought it was a mistake, and the chances of getting another were really low. I sighed, the world was cruel.

"I'm going to my room.", I announced.

I opened the door and got in, I took the books Leorio had given me out of the drawer and started flipping, It was better if I started studying now, the exams weren't going to take themselves. No use. I couldn't get him out of my mind. It was insane, the impact that boy had on me, it was sad, because it left me desperate and craving for more and it was amazing, because there was nothing that felt like it, in the whole world. I groaned.

"Curse such temptations!"

I went back downstairs, Gon and Leorio were still on the floor, playing chess. Killua wasn't on the couch anymore, must be in his room. If I'd listen to my instinct I'd run upstairs, and though I didn't know where or which his room was, I'd find it, and maybe enter...excuse? Just for the sake of curiosity...or a kiss maybe?

The door knocked bringing me back to reality. I shook my head, hell. I went to the end of the hall and opened the door. A blonde woman, with short hair, and a bad taste for fashion was standing infront of me.

"Umm, hey? Can I help you?"

"Yes.", her voice was rather masculine but very gentle. "I'm Kurapika."

I gasped, he was Killua's friend and he wasn't a girl.

"Oh, I'm so sorry, come in.", wow, so much for the muscular features. He wasn't the scary looking, gym dude type, but I had to admit he was very handsome. He looked sixteen or something, and he was taller than both Gon and Killua.

"You are?", he asked rather politely.

"Claire, I'm Gon and Killua's friend.

"It's nice to meet you, you have a very nice name."

"You too and thank you."

I turned to lead him into the house. I gasped, Killua was standing right behind me, I hadn't noticed he was there. He looked at Kurapika and arched an eyebrow.

"Kuraphika!", he said in a bright voice.

Kurapika sighed, "It's Kurapika!", he whisper shouted.

"Yeah, yeah, come in."

Both Gon and Leorio greeted Kurapika, he seemed like a fine guy.

We sat down on the couches, all four of them caught up with everything they had missed since they parted. I was bored. There was no room for me in the discussion, what could a girl say in a four man conversation? I put my face on my elbowed arm and resisted the urge to sigh. I tried to memorize the patterns of the colours in the room, absolutely entertaining. Someone put their hand on mine, I slightly turned to see, it was Killua. His fingers curled around mine until my heart was beating so fast I thought it would come out of my chest. I couldn't help it, he affected me that much. I decided to listen to the conversation before I had a nose bleed or threw up.

"It's no use, you don't need to learn how to beat them, they're all dead.", I saw a flash of sadness and rage in Kurapika's eyes as he said these words.

"We know, but there's one of them who can read minds and she's still alive.", Killua pressed.

"Doesn't matter, the boss is dead.", Kurapika sighed. He definately wasn't happy about it. "My nen doesn't work that way.", he looked at his hands. "It's the result of my rage, it's not an ultimate power. It does have it's weaknesses."

"Don't..", Killua said.

"What?"

"Don't tell us how it works, don't tell us your weak points."

"What's the use of hiding it now?"

"Tell Gon.", Killua's expression was serious.

"Why me?", Gon's eyes widened.

"He's the only one here, you can trust more than your life, he won't reveal your secret, you can count on that, old man, Chloe, let's go."

"Chloe?", I asked astonished.

"Yeah, isn't that your name?"

"Wow you surprise me everyday.", I rolled my eyes and hid my anger. If he was that jerk in public, then I didn't want the sweet heart behind the scenes. Idiot. Jerk.

I stood up and followed both the boys to the end of the corridor. I turned to look at them, they were peeking from the sides. Amazing. I headed for my room.

"Wait.", Killua was looking at me.

"Why?"

"You're not staying? You don't wanna listen?"

"Why would I? I'm not a liar, and not a jerk either."

Without sparing him another glance, I went to my room. I started flipping through my books again. I wasn't sure weather I was studying or just cursing Killua in my head, a good thirty minutes passed away trying to determine that. I bit my lower lip, I had gone crazy.

Killua opened my door, not even bothering to knock anymore.

"What do you want?", Jerk.

"You."

My eyes widened, "What the hell is wrong with you?", another mood shift? Great, just what I needed to make my day.

"Nothing, what's wrong with you?"

He was messing with me. He enjoyed it when I made a fool out of myself. "Get out."

The sarcastic look on his face changed into something more serious, softness? Anger? Hard to tell.

"Actually.", he said, did he ever even use that word before? "I came here to remind you that we had a deal the other day."

"What?", was he crazy?

"I explained about nen to you, you promised me anything I wanted in return.", I did promise him that, and I totally forgot about it too. What was he upto?, "You said you weren't a liar, so are you going to keep that promise or not?"

"Uh.. yeah.", I sighed, he was probably going to make me do something embarassing and humiliate me. I had no choice, it was true I wasn't a liar, and I wasn't going to change that now. "What do you want."

"Not too much.", he said smirking as he leaned against the door. "Just a kiss, or two."

I gasped, his expression didn't change. He was teasing me, or was he? His smirk was fixed at its place but his eyes, they were hungry. My eyes narrowed. I stood up and took a few steps back, he was freaking me out. He straightened and just before he moved forward, his hand slid to his back and he locked the door. I froze. I wanted to kiss him, ofcourse I did, but something in his expression told me to keep my distance. It was pathetic as he took a step forward, I took one backwards. My feet froze just as my back touched the wall, this was the end of the line for me. He put his hands in his pockets as he closed the space between us. Once his face was inches from mine, he took his hands out again, he placed both his palms against the wall. He was leaning in. My blood was rushing in my veins.

"Stop.", I whispered.

He froze at once.

"Why do you do it?", I asked in a whisper.

"What?"

"Treat me like nothing infront of everyone else."

"I don'.."

"You do.", I interrupted him, "You do and it hurts."

"I'm.. sorry.", his eyes were apologetic. He turned his gaze away from mine. He drew his body backwards. I gripped his shirt with both my hands.

"Don't go, just don't do it again. Ever"

His eyes widened, then gleamed. "I won't", he shook his head.

"Thank you.", I didn't know what else I was supposed to say.

I moved my hand and gripped the collar of his shirt. He burried his face in my hair.

"I didn't want it.", he said

"What?"

"To fall for a girl."

I gasped.

"I don't know how to stop wanting you, I can't."

I took in a deep breath.

"Then don't.", I whispered. "Cause I can't either."

"I was trying to get away from you, not to spend time with you, it makes me want to be with you that much more."

I smiled. And leaned my forehead against his. He was being so honest.

"You deserve better.", he said. "My past involves murder, blood, I was an assasin."

"I don't care.", his past was the last thing on my mind right now. "Don't run away from me please, how can you be afraid that I won't be able to accept your past when you yourself don't know anything about mine."

"I don't care.", he said.

I pushed him back. He didn't care? He was looking at me with a mixture of shock and hurt. I went and sat on the bed. I patted the space next to me inviting him. His eyes softened and he sat down.

"My parents divorced when I was seven.", I sighed. "I have an older brother and a younger sister, my parents divorced a few months after my sister's birth. My mother took custody of all three of us. That was when I last saw my father, I haven't heard of him since, and I don't want to either.", Killua's eyes were full of concern as he looked at my face. I dropped my gaze. "A few years after that my mother started working for the mafia. Killing, spying, threatening, all the bad stuff.", I passed a hand through my hair, my palms were too sweaty. He took my hand and curled his fingers around mine. I smiled lightly. "My brother started working with my mother. My sister was the favourite child. I never treated her right, I was jealous, she always got all the attention. But, hey, who likes the middle child anyway?, my voice broke at the end. "I never felt like I belonged there. My mother expected me to take after her, just like my brother did. I didn't belong there, my fear of blood was the very proof of that. I killed a person once.", I bit my lower lip as hard as I could. I took another breath calming myself. "I killed a person once, I was on a mission. After that murder I haven't been able to forgive myself. I was disguisted at myself, I hated myself, and I knew that if I stayed that was all that I was going to get. My family killed for money. I couldn't. I'd rather die on the streets than have my hands stained again." I closed my eyes. He didn't say anything. "Please say you hate me."

Killua looked at me with his eyebrows raised. "You've killed a person?"

I nodded.

"I've killed hundreds.", he said looking away. "I'm the middle child too, I've got four brothers, and well unlike you I got alot of attention, they had high hopes for me, they called me the heir.", he sighed, "I turned out the greatest disappoinment of all, I didn't feel like I belonged there to.", he shook his head smiling. "You know why?"

I shook my head.

"Because I was born to be an assasin but I was meant to be a hunter.", he smiled. "And I won't die til I become one."

It was amazing, how he always said the right thing at the right time, it was like he knew exctly what would make me feel better in that moment."Wait.. aren't you one already?"

"No, I was disqualified at the last stage."

"Why?"

He sighed. "I killed a person."

I pursed my lips. "So you're going to try again next year?"

"Yeah, and the year after that if it doesn't work."

I smirked. "I wanna try next year too."

He raised his eyebrows. "Really?"

"Totally."

His eyes bored into mine. I leaned forward and kissed his cheek. He blushed. I smiled. I traced my thumb along his lower lip, and then on his upper lip, and then moved it to his jaw. He grasped my hair with his hand and drew me forward until our lips met. I sighed, and parted my lips. He slid his tongue inside my mouth. It couldn't be described what I felt right now. After sometime I was gasping for air. He moved his lips to my jaw, my breathing was heavy. I crashed my lips to his again. This kiss was more agressive, more energetic than the first one. I smiled against his lips. He broke the kiss leaning his forehead against mine. Very lightly he kissed the tip of my nose. I giggled. He always made me feel extra ordinary. He put his arms around me and I leaned my head on his shoulder. This was the only place where I felt I belonged.

Someone knocked the door loudly. Killua stood up and took my hand as he went to the door and unlocked it. It was Gon.

"Hey, did I disturb you?", he said as he looked at our hands.

"Yeah,", Killua said, putting his arm around my waist. I gasped. I couldn't believe it, did he just do that? Infront of Gon?

"Oh.", Gon looked embarassed.

"He's kidding.", I said raising my eye brows at Killua. "What's the rush?"

"You won't believe it.", Gon said with a serious expression.

"Try us."

"The troupe's still alive, the corpses were fake."


	6. Escape Plan

Hey guys! Fist of all I wanna thank all the people who have read my story and followed me :D and well I only got one review so far, and thanks to ever it was. I'm hoping for more! Thing is now I'll be posting one chapter per week, like every Monday, maybe even sooner if I can squeez out sometime, I've got school and a busy routine so yeah...anyway, thanks for reading! I love you guys. - Basma

Chapter: 6

"Escape Plan."

When you're empty you've got nothing to hide. It's like having a soul but missing a life.

"Wow, well you really shouldn't have told me that.", I said to Killua as he just finished explaining the weaknesses of Kurapika's nen ability.

"Why?", he asked confused.

"Well, number one, the woman who can read minds, Pakunoda, is still alive and two now we know that all the troupe members are alive, what if they sort of capture us again?"

Killua rolled his eyes.

I glared at him. "So we know about the troupe's base right? What's next?"

"We have to target Pakunoda.", Kurapika seemed tense.

The next two hours passed planning on exactly how the plan would be carried out. Killua and Kurapika studied every detail, this was some serious stuff. But the thing that worried me the most was that Killua would innitiate the mission, by enetering the troupe's base, alone. What were these guys thinking? Were they crazy?

5:30 pm, I was staring out of the car's windows. The skies were crying. The rain drops slid on the glass.

"Claire, you're going to bite your nails off, don't worry Killua's fine.", Gon assured me. Well would you look at that, I was biting, no tearing my nails, and I didn't even notice.

"Yeah, I'm okay."

I closed my eyes in an attempt to calm myself. I felt like smiling because the memory of what happened just moments ago came to my mind. Just before leaving Killua crushed me into a tight hug and kissed me on the forehead leaving Leorio and Kurapika with their mouths wide open. Again, if I could blush I would be red as a tomato.

I cocked my head to the side and stared out of the windshield. I felt pathetic, because even though this was an extremely serious situation it was funny as well. The reason? Kurapika's disguise. He was wearing a black pilot cap with round black goggles. But that wasn't all, he wore a a knee length dull blonde wig and wrapped it all up with a black suit. Leorio was playing the role of the driver.

Kurapika's cell phone buzzed.

"What is it Killua?", Killua? My palms started sweating. "Impossible.", Kurapika gasped. "I'll see what I can do."

"Kurapika what's going..", I spoke as soon as I got the chance.

"Wait.", Kurapika raised his index finger. He started dialing digits on his cell phone. "Melody?", I could hear a soft buzzing. "Yes I need your help."

Melody was one of Kurapika's co-workers. She had very sensitive ears and could hear over a very wide range, and this happened to be her special ability. Kurapika told us about Killua's situation. Killua had entered the same deserted construction area but boy did they have a surprise for him. He found about fifty copies of the same building and he had absolutely no idea where the troupe was. That was where Melody came in, she would help Killua out by detecteing the troupe's location.

About twenty minutes had passed. Gon dialed Killua's number.

"Where are they now? Okay.", he shut the phone. "Leorio, train station."

Leorio stepped on the gas. We were rushing ahead. I was freaked out, it was time to act. I just hoped the little training Gon and Killua had given me was enough to accomplish something, even if it was a little something. The rain had caused a traffic jam, Leorio was furiously beeping at the cars ahead and using extremely inappropriate language, but that was the last thing on all of our minds because while we were sitting here helpless, doing nothing, the troupe was getting away.

"They're after Neon.", Kurapika gasped with an expression that gave the idea that he had just been slapped hard on the face.

"What?", Gon and I demanded.

"Neon Nostrad, they're after her that's why they're going to the train station, they're heading towards the hotel they're lodging in!"

Suddenly Gon pushed the door of the car open, he immediately took my hand and dragged me outside. A few moments later we were running towards the train station, Leorio and Kurapika calling behind us, but there was no way he would listen to them now, because when Gon put something into his head he wouldn't be at peace until he brought it to an end. The pavement was slippery and I couldn't help but take deep breaths, man was Gon fast, I was glad he was towing me with him because there was no way I could keep up with such a speed. We turned around the next street, I just hoped we would catch up with them in time.

Gon was furiously pressing numbers on his phone. "Where are they?", he snapped it shut.

We slid around the next corner, I never saw Gon so serious. He pushed people without even the thought of excusing himself. We turned past the next lane and Gon froze holding me back as well. He saw them, I was sure he did. After a few moments we were on the run again but this time we were very careful, they were jut ahead of us. They were six and with their freaky outfits and the way they carried themselves they couldn't help but get noticed.

Then me and Gon both felt it, someone was behind us, but I was sure this wasn't an enemy. In the next moment Killua was running by our side. My heart sped up in an abnormal way, this always happened when he was around. I tried to concentrate on the enemy, easier said than done.

They seemed to be discussing something while walking, or maybe it was just my imagination. Then all of a sudden three of them sped their pace up, they were no longer visible. The three left behind stopped. No fucking way, they knew we were following them. At that moment we were right between a lane and a mail box. In approximately a second Killua jumped to the side of the lane while Gon put his arms beneath my legs and carried me behind the mail box.

"We know you're there.", a woman, no a girl's voice called.

My heart skipped a beat. Gon put his index finger on his lips signaling me to keep quiet, I nodded.

"One's in the ally, the other's behind the mail box.", another woman's voice said.

Without making a sound Gon put me down and exposed himself. I gasped, what the hell did he just do? He raised his arms. "I give up.", he said I, so he didn't want me to come out.

As if things weren't disastrous enough Killua came out of the ally with his hands in his pockets. "Me too."

"You two again?", this was the woman speaking."The reward for our capture has been drawn back."

"We didn't know that.", Killua said, boy was he good at lying.

"Is that girl with you too?", I held my breath.

"No.", Killua's voice was hard, but convincing.

"Who are these two?", a male voice demanded.

"They're the one's Nobunaga held at the base, should we kill them?"

"Not yet.", not YET?, "Are they related to the chain user?"

"No, Paku checked them, they were clear."

"Well then she will check them again."

"You two, come with us if you don't wanna die."

Gon and Killua stepped forward. I heard a sharp sound like someone hit them with a whip, but I had no idea what it was. I heard their steps as they walked away, and then the sounds completely faded. I felt a lump in my throat, but this was no time to cry, I got up as fast as I could, just as I was about to run after them I heard footsteps.

"Claire stop!", it was Kurapika, and by his side was a small elf like lady.

"Yeah?"

"Don't go after them, they're heading to the hotel where he Nostrads are loudging, but we can't release Gon and Killua like this, come with me, I have a plan."

6:45pm, I was sweating like an idiot. Kurapika had told me atleast fifty times to keep calm.

"The plan will work, right?", I asked nervously.

"Yes, yes it will.", Kurapika said annoyed, this wasn't the first time I had asked this question, and I was definately getting on his nerves.

"Is Leorio going to be fine?", Leorio was inside the hotel waiting for the troupe, he would innitiate the plan "Save Killua and Gon from the troupe by capturing Chorollo", yeah sounded easy, right?

"For the twenty-seventh time Claire, the plan will work, Killua and Gon will be here with us in no time and Leorio is going to be fine."

I pursed my lips.

Kurapika took out his cell phone. He pressed the call button and put the cell phone to his ear. "Leorio, it's time give them the signal."

I could hear loud buzzing from the other side of the line. I crossed my fingers, hoping everything would be fine.

"Your heart is restless, please calm down.", Melody's voice was very soft and just louder than a wisper. Her gaze was concerned and reassuring.

I gave her an attempt of a smile. "Sorry."

She smiled warmly and nodded. She was a very caring person, sort of motherly even.

"It's 6:55.", Kurapika announced. "Melody, Claire stay alert and stay in the car, and Claire, stop being so nervous." He opened the door and got out. I gulped, I wasn't nervous, no, I was absolutely freaked out.

It was 7:01pm, I clutched the leather seat with my hands and bit my lower lip. I avoided making any eye contact with the two people seated to my right, namely Kurapika and Chorollo Lucifer. Kurapika was in an extremely tense and serious mood, I was freaked out just by sitting next to him, to his right Chorollo, who was tied in Kurapika's nen chains and had a bored expression. Chorollo was absolutely creepy looking, even more than Kurapika in his weird looking disguise. He had slick black hair that were gelled back, big black eyes that were framed by thick lashes. He wore two huge round earings that were the size of fortune telling spheres and had a cross tatoo on his forehead. His fur-collared leather coat added a bit of elegance in his appearance.

Kurapika dialed some digits on his phone. After a few beeps someone picked up. "The two boys shouldn't be harmed.", Kurapika's voice was serious, very serious, if voices had colours his right now would be black, coal black. There was some buzzing from the other side. "Your boss will be unharmed as long as the two hostages are, I wish to speak to the one called Pakunoda.", there was pause. "Go at a distance from your group members.", boy was he bossy. "I have rules, and you'll have to obey them if you want your boss back, unharmed. You will not tell the troupe members about the boys memories. You will come with both the hostages at the airport, alone, no one should be with you accept the two." Kurapika nodded. "Now give the phone back to the receiver.", there was a pause for about ten seconds. "I have explained the details to the woman, do as she says if you want your boss back alive." Kurapika snapped the phone shut. He was really pissed off.

Out of nowhere Chorollo chuckled. Kurapika's eyes widened and he stared at him. "They won't listen to you.", he said like he was relaxing under the sun in a resort. "She won't come, not for me,", he was smiling, and there was no trace of doubt in his eyes.

I could feel Kurapika's aura next to me, it was expanding. I made the futal mistake of looking into Kurapika's eyes. I froze. They were red, he was furious. He absolutely hated the man, no, he loathed him. Kurapika snatched his collar and stared at him, like if he would stare hard enough he would be able to kill him or maybe form a hole in his forehead. "Shut up."

Chorollo smiled. "You don't believe me, do you?"

I heard something rip. I looked beneath me, Kurapika had taken out a piece of the leather cloth from the seat. "I said shut up.", Kurapika's voice was slightly louder. "I'll kill you, shut up!"

I didn't look at them, but I knew Leorio and Melody were just as tensed as I was.

"Kurapika he's only provoking you!", said Leorio.

"They won't come.", Chorollo repeated.

"Shut up!"

"Kurapika stop, he's not lying.", Melody's voice was louder than usual.

"What?", Kurapika looked like someone had punched him in the gut.

"His heartbeat is completely normal, it's true, he actually believes he has no value as a hostage."

Kurapika took deep breaths to calm himself. He took out his phone and pressed the redial button. "Let me speak to one of the hostages.", it was a man speaking from the other line, I was sure. Kurapika pursed his lips, "Then our deal is over.", he snapped the phone shut, but he was calm, calmer than before. What had just happened? His phone rang after ten seconds. I could hear the buzzing again. "This shouldn't happen again, let me talk to the hostages.", after a few seconds I could hear a male voice from the other line, not just some male voice, a very beautiful, perfect one, not just anyone's voice it was Killua's and I could recognize it from miles away. "Is she coming?", Kurapika nodded, to himself. "Okay, I'll call again."

Thirty minutes had passed. We were waiting at the place designated by Kurapika. Killua and Gon would be here soon. I hoped. Kurapika told me and Leorio to stay in the side room. He and Melody were with Chorollo, they were supposed to meet up with Pakunoda there.

"What's the average concentration of RBC's in the blood of man?", Leorio asked, he was questioning me for the annual exams which were a month away. Honestly I hadn't done a great deal of studies but I was surprised, I knew most of the answers.

"Five to five point five million per cubic millimeter of blood.", I said smugly.

He nodded in agreement. "The enzyme which digests proteins?"

"Pepsin."

"Good, you've been studying well, keep going and you'll get amazing grades."

I grinned. But not even this could distract me. I was way to worried about Gon and Killua. I connected my headphones to my ipod and played the first song in my playlist, still no use. A good twenty minutes had passed this way. I stood up.

"Where are you going?", Leorio asked raising his eyebrows.

"I'm tired of waiting, I'm gonna go check outside."

He shrugged.

"Okay, I'm not going, we both know how terrifying Kurapika is at this damned moment."

He laughed and shook his head. I sat back down.

After sometime we heard a knock on the door. We both looked at each other and then at the door again. "Come in?", I said confused.

Someone unlocked te door knob, so Kurapika had locked it? What a jerk. A shiny haired figure peeked from the door, then the door fully opened revealing a beautiful blue eyed boy with a black spiky haired boy by his side. I gasped, my eyes widened. A normal person would greet her best friend and her possible boyfriend with a hand shake or a hug or a smile, my body had a different way of doing things. Instead of doing anything, I froze and tears started streaming down my cheeks. Both their eyes widened. Then all of a sudden I threw myself at both of them. It was an awkward three people hug, but it felt wonderful, these two boys felt like home, and with them was where I belonged.

"See Gon?", said Killua with a sarcastic tone. "She's this crazy for me.", he wiped the tears off my face.

Gon giggled. "What about me?"

I kissed his spiky hair, "You're amazing, you both are."

After Leorio greeted the boys we all exited the room and went to Kurapika. He was outside staring at the sky. I don't know what he did but he didn't look happy, he didn't look happy but he looked satisfied, and whatever he did, he did right, I was sure.


	7. Blue eyes and brain fries

Hey guys! Thanks again for the reviews and follows, you guys are amazing. So, I just wanted to say that I don't have any fixed updating times, I mean whenever I'm done with the chapter I'll post it. The chapter I'm posting now is longer than the previous ones and so will be the ones that follow. I hope you guys like it. Thank you once again for reading. - Basma.

Chapter: 7

"Blue eyes and brain fries."

Feelings are like hot water. It feels good when its hot, it pains when it burns but there's a point when the heat is too much to take and it starts to feel cold. That's why when you feel too much eventually you go numb, cold.

I smiled as I watched Killua hang the black suit he had picked for the auction tomorrow in his closet. This was the first time ever I was in his room. I had to admit it did reflect a bit of his personality. It was covered with a thick, black, furry carpet. The curtains were a navy blue, just a shade or two darker than his eyes. The double bed covered with black sheets, and the pillows were a midnight blue. I was on his bed with my legs bent and my face on both my palms.

"You're room looks alot like you."

"Black?"

"No, not in that sense, I mean it sort of represents who you are."

He smirked, "Like?"

"Well the black shows the cold, dark side of you.", his eyes widened, "Which looks pretty hot on you."

"Woah, so my dark side is what turns you on?"

"No, let me finish, and the blue, it always reminds me of your eyes, the blue represents the sweet, caring, tender Killua."

"Which one would you like now?"

"The normal Killua, with some sprinkles of the dark, mysterious side and for the final touch some frosting of the sweet one."

He raised an eyebrow and sat next to me. "You know, you seem to know alot about me, but I feel bad, I don't know almost anything about you."

My eyes widened. "I told you about my past, you're the first one."

"Yeah, but I told you, that doesn't matter, I wanna know more important stuff about you."

"Like?"

"Like your favourite band, foods you like, stuff like that."

I pursed my lips. It was adorable that these litle things about me were important to him. I smiled. "Okay, let's make a deal, you ask me a question about me, and I'll ask you the same question, in this way we can both get to know each other."

He was thoughtful. "Fine, let me see. What's your full name?"

"Can't we skip that? I'm Claire, that's all."

He looked at me with accusing eyes.

I sighed. "Okay, but don't laugh."

He nodded.

"Camila Clarisse Duerr Gaspardo."

He arched his eyebrows, "I didn't hear a Claire anywhere in there."

I bit my lips, I hated my name. It was too fancy and too long, so I went by just Claire, and I liked it, it was simple and sort of suited me. I had gotten tha Camila from my grandma' Camila Marie, while the Clarisse was from my mom Alexandra Clarisse, and finally the Duerr was my own, but I didn't use that, Duerr, seriously?

"Wow, I don't see it."

"What?"

"You as a Camila or a Clarisse or a Duerr for that matter."

I chuckled,"What do you see me as?"

"Umm..You look like a Chloe."

"Aww, not that again please, what's wrong with Claire?"

"Nothing, you're right you're not a Chloe, Camila's fine for you."

I pursed my lips, "Seriously?"

"Yeah, Camila's nice and as a plus, only I get to call you that."

I rolled my eyes. "What's your full name?"

"Killua Zephyr Zoldyck.", it was like this name was designed just for him, it was perfect.

"Wow."

"Favourite kind of music?"

"Pop-rock."

"Classic."

I gasped, "No way, you? listen to classic? You look like a full time rock freak."

He laughed. "Don't judge a book by its cover, although I am beautiful both inside and out."

I rolled my eyes.

"The sound of the piano and the violin is very soothing, that's why I like classic, it helps me keep my calm."

"Do you play anything?"

He nodded. "My mother taught me the piano, I've been playing since I was five. I can also play the guitar, our head butler Gotoh taught me that."

"W-o-w, no offense but I just can't picture it, you playing the piano, I see a rocker dude with a bandana on his head playing an electric guitar or drums like its nobody's business."

He laughed, no howled. "Do you play anything?"

"Yeah, I play video games."

He grinned, "Bloody roar 2?"

I smirked, I stared at my nails, "Even unlocked the Chimera Beast."

"No way.", he gasped.

"Yeah way."

The next hour passed in the same way, we would both ask each other questions and then laugh at the answers.

A ray of light pricked my eyes. I fluttered them open to see the most beautiful sight, a sleeping Killua, with all his hair ruffled on his face. He looked absolutely innocent and harmless, it was hard to think that this boy who dealt with so much in his life was just about to turn 15, it was impressive but it was sad, how his childhood had been taken away from him just like that, if he even had any. The corner of his mouth was lifted up in a cute one sided smile, I satisfied my self by thinking he was dreaming about me. His face was just inches from my mine and his arms were around me, how amazing it would be to wake up to this everyday. Wait..what? I was in his room! We accidentaly fell asleep while taking. I didn't move, it would probably wake him up. If I exited Killua's room like this, at this time of the morning, what would the others think? I sighed. Who cared? I closed my eyes again and snuggled into his chest, his arms tightened around me and he lightly kissed me on my hair. I smiled.

"You smell like flowers."

I chuckled, "You smell like musk and chocolate."

"What time is it?"

"10 am."

He got up and I cocked my head to see him, his blue eyes, or sapphires were as bright as ever. He was lightly scratching his hair, then he passed a hand through them. He turned to me. "How was the night m'lady?"

I raised my eyebrows. "How was it supposed to be?"

"Umm... alone? Normal.", he waved his hand. "With me? Off the hook."

I rolled my eyes. "I was asleep most of the time, so I didn't realize you're honourable presence."

He nodded. "That's called being ungrateful, but you know what?"

"What?"

"Now you'll miss me every night."

I laughed. "Dream on."

"I only dream about you.", his expression was serious.

I bit my lower lip and got out of the bed. He was going to drive me crazy if I stayed any longer. I was just at the door.

"Leaving just like that?"

I made a questioning expression.

He coughed, sarcastically. "Shouldn't I leave my name on your lips in the early morning?"

"It's not early, it's 10am.", I unlocked the knob and just before getting out I blew him a kiss. I thought I saw a bit of surprise on his face, who knows?

3pm. we were outside the auction building. Today was the last day the auction would proceed. Killua and Gon decided to give it a shot to get the game. Everyone around us looked like Millionaires, let me rephrase Billionaires. The men were elegantly dressed in black or white suits and matching ties, while the women were wearing very exposing designer dresses. I remebered when my mom used to take us to the formal parties, I hated wearing long and expensive dresses, especially the ones that showed too much skin, they were embarassing, so this time I made a slight change to my outfit. I was wearing a white collared, button down shirt with black velvet shorts and black boots, no heels. I hooked it all up with a sparkly black tie. My hair were falling down to my back and I was wearing a black hair ring. When we went shopping for the auction yesterday Gon and Killua insisted I take a more feminine outfit, so this was the most feminine thing I could find that would suit me. A good lot of my legs was exposed because these shorts were really really short, but it felt good, and I hated covering my legs anyway.

Killua and Gon were wearing black formal suits and I had to admit, they were both handsome young men. Killua's blue eyes brought a sort of navy blue shade in the outfit, while Gon's hazel eyes looked slightly darker with that suit. Zepile-san, who was also with us, also wore a black suit, but it was sad to say he had no charm, none at all.

"Let's go.", Killua took my hand, making my heart beat so fast I felt dizzy.

As we walked forward I noticed Killua staring at me. I turned to him and raised my eyebrows.

"What?", he asked in shock, "You look hot.", he raised his right hand apologetically.

I smiled and bit my lip. Killua thought I looked hot. If he liked this style then I was going to make a few changes to my wardrobe.

We were just at the door to the hall when at both my sides Gon and Killua froze. I looked forward just in time to see two men standing infront of us when all of a sudden Gon took my left hand, my right was already in Killua's and they both sped backwards from where we came. They stopped at the enterance. I was breathing heavily.

"What the hell was that?", my palms on my knees. I saw two shadows infront of me. They were the same men. How did they get here so fast? They were blocking our way. I looked carefully at their faces. I recognized one of them as the guy who told me and Killua to shut up at the troupe's base. No fucking way. The troupe? Again?

"Don't worry we're not going to kill you.", said the black haired one. "Not yet." Again that? Give me a break. "We're just here to enjoy the auction."

The other man was a blonde guy, who looked like a football coach, he stepped forward. "We just came to say that Paku wanted to thank you two.", he was pointing at Killua and Gon.

"What?", Killua was speechless.

Without another word the two left, leaving both Killua and Gon frozen.

3:15pm. We were seated at our places in the auction hall. The auction would start in exact fifteen minutes. The troupe members just scared the hell out of me. The troupe was always a bad omen, the last time they showed up they kidnapped Gon and Killua and now Kurapika was left with a high fever at home. I felt sorry for him, he looked really bad when we saw him this morning.

Killua waved a hand infront of my face.

"Wha-what?", I just came back to reality.

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm great."

"I can take you home if you want."

"Uh, no, seriously I'm fine.", I turned to look at the two troupe members who were sitting just a few seats away from us. I put my head on Killua's shoulder and he kissed my hair.

The auction was absolutely boring. People just throwing off a bunch of money over stupid stuff. The game Gon and Killua were after, Greed Island, was the fourteenth item of the auction, we were only at the tenth. Gon's eyes wer sparkling as he saw how people raised their fingers and indicated the prices they were ready to give. Killua, who was seated to my right was looking nervous and constantly staring to his right, like he had seen a ghost or something. I shrugged, I didn't want to bother him.

Atlast people started bidding for the game. Zepile-san was explaining to Gon how bidding worked and Gon looked mystified.

"If you raise two fingers it means you want to double the price."

Gon made a victory sign with his fingers. "Like this?"

"Number 331 has bidded 4 million jennies", the auction hostess announced as she saw Gon's raised fingers.

"Oh!", both Gon and Zepile-san froze. I bit back a giggle. Then another man bidded 5 million.

Gon and Zepile-san sighed in relief. "Don't do that again!"

"Hehe"

I turned to Killua, he was still staring to his side. Who was he looking at? I looked to where his gaze was directed. I couldn't determine exactly who he was looking at because I saw three people. A grey-haired man, he looked old, a blonde woman in a red dress and a fat black-haired boy, in a black suit that hardly fitted him, I know it was mean to say but he reminded me of a pig. Was Killua staring at that woman? Did he like girls older than him? She was very pretty and compared to her on a scale from 1 to 10, I would be a 4 and she an 8. I sighed and looked away. Killua was a guy after all, and boys liked girls with looks.

"Greed Island goes to Mr. Battera!", the auction lady announced. Finally it was over. We stood up and got out of the hall.

We saw a crowded corner. The man who had won the game, Mr. Battera was being interviewed by a journalist.

"I intend to buy all the copies of Greed Island in the world, and I only hire professional fighters who have chances of winning the game for me."

I knew this would give ideas to both these boys. Mr. Battera was heading toward the V.I.P section of the building, Gon and Killua ran behind him. I shrugged and followed Zepile-san to the car.

I had never even said a word to Zepile-san, ever, we never talked, not even indirectly and sitting here, alone in the car with him felt really awkward.

I inhaled deeply. It looked ill mannered ignoring him like this. I was just about to call him out when someone knocked at the window. It was Killua. Phew! Saved at the last moment. I opened both the doors, Gon came through the right one and Killua through the left one. As he sat Killua slid one hand behind my back. I sighed. I wondered if he really found that woman attractive, that raised a new question in my mind. Had Killua ever kissed a girl other than me? If he did it wouldn't be such a surprise, girls would go head over heels for a guy like him.

We entered the apartment at exact 5:55pm. I felt exhausted. I went to my room and changed into cotton shorts and a flannel t-shirt. I brushed my hair and tied them into a messy ponytail. This was no time to go to bed so instead I just went downstairs in the Tv lounge. It was empty. I wondered where everyone went. I checked the kitchen, no one. I was just outside Kurapika's room. I didn't know whether I should knock or not, he might be sleeping. I turned back and was about to walk away when the door opened.

"Claire?"

"Uh.. hey Kurapika, did I disturb you?"

"No, not at all, I couldn't fall asleep."

"How are you feeling?"

"Much better, thank you, why don't you come in? I'd love some company right now."

I smiled, "Uh, sure.", I went inside the room and sat on a chair next to his bed. He was looking better but he also looked tired, he walked clumsily to his bed and sat down, he looked drunk.

"You're crazy you know?"

"Eh? What?"

"You shouldn't take stuff so seriously, look at what you've done to yourself.", I said pointing to him.

He sighed. "I'm fine now, Leorio says that in two days I'll be good as new."

"You're leaving after that, aren't you?"

"Yeah.", he said with an apologetic smile.

"Did you tell Gon?"

"Eh... not yet."

I shook my head. Without realizing it I was biting my nails again.

"You look worried."

"What? No way, why would I be? It's not like Killua's gonna marry that girl."

"What girl?"

My eyes widened as I realized what I just said. "What girl?"

Kurapika pursed his lips. "Okay, I know you're not gonna tell me, but just let me give you a good advice, instead of making assumptions you should just go and ask Killua."

"You think he'll tell me?"

"Yeah, go talk to him."

I took a deep breath. "You're really easy to talk to you know?"

Kurapika smiled weakly. Now that I came to think about it, Kurapika looked more like a fatherly figure. He was so mature and always cautious. At times he did lose control but that was just because of all the rage he was hiding inside him. Who could blame him? Losing you're family, no, you're entire clan, that must be hard to accept.

I put my palm to his forehead. It was warm. "You should get some rest, are you hungry?"

"No, not at all.", he shook his head.

"Then go to sleep and get well soon."

He nodded. "Yes ma'am."

I giggled and left the room, closing the door behind me. I took a deep breath. Kurapika was absolutely right, I shouldn't make assumptions, I would go and talk to Killua and I would do it right now.

I went up the stairs. I crossed the hallway and stood outside the door of his room. _Do it. Don't. Do it. Don't. Oh! Shut up._

I finally knocked the door. No response. I knocked again, nothing. I got tired and then just opened the door. I found Killua sitting with his back toward the door and his face to the wall. He immediately turned around as he heard me come in. He looked...different and the way he watched me, it was scary, like the way he glared at me at Heaven's Arena.

"Uh.. hey?"

"Did I say you could come in?", his tone was harsh, angry.

"Oh, I just, I'm sorry, but I need to talk to you."

"No, I'm busy right now, get out.", he waved his hand like he was shooing away a kid.

"Killua what's wrong?"

"Out.", he said pointing behind me.

My eyes widened. I got out and closed the door. My vision was already blurry as the tears started forming in my eyes. I ran to my room and locked the door behind me. I put my head on my pillow, I was expecting a water fall with what just happened, instead my eyes were only slightly wet, but I couldn't bring myself to cry. I stared at the ceiling. One thing was sure, life could never be perfect. No one had ever talked to me like that in my entire life, not even my family. I didn't know why he acted like that but no excuse in the world was good enough for having such a behaviour, with anyone, not just me. I was still figuring out who the real Killua was, maybe the side of him I saw tonight was who he really was and he just tried to mask it up with that sweet side of his.

I had seen alot in my life. But no matter what happened I never believed there was such a thing as moving on, it was impossible back then and even right now. I knew very well that even if Killua turned out to be the monster he was raised to be I would still love him, and there was nothing I could do about it. He could do or say whatever he wanted but there was no way I could get him out of my heart. Ofcourse I would keep myself at a distance if that's what he wanted, I would even accept watching him with another girl just to see him smile, because when I cared for someone, I gave it all I had.

I had no idea what I would do tomorrow, ignore him or go apologize myself, so instead I just closed my eyes and a few tears escaped. One thing was sure if not much, I was a little braver and a little more realistic and that made me feel better. Somewhere in the middle of these thoughts I fell asleep.

_Blue eyes. Staring accusingly at me. What did I do? I knew these eyes very well. They were like the sun to me, if I didn't look at them, my day would never start, my dawn would never break. There was a rhythm in the way they blinked, like they were trying to tell me something. Then I saw it. But just as soon as I did, a flash. I felt numb. Maybe like I was floating. Someone was constantly hitting the rewind and stop button. The blue of the eyes expanded and I found my self staring at the ocean. I touched the water, it was cold. Someone was calling me, I could hear it. The ocean flipped over, I saw the sky. It was within my reach, I could touch it, this wasn't the sky, it flashed. Thunder, a spark and then darkness._

"I'm fine, really Gon, I just didn't get much sleep last night.", this was the third time Gon asked me the same question "ARE YOU OKAY?". Couldn't blame him I had dark circles under my eyes and I looked like someone who had just been recalled from the dead. I couldn't remember anything from my dream last night, just..blue? The ocean? Thunder maybe?

I heard Killua descending from the stairs, how did I know it was him? Because the sound was almost inaudible, that's the way he always moved, like a ninja.

I didn't know whether I was mad at him or not, I felt like slapping him and then inviting him to sit next to me, so yeah. I didn't even know what kind of behaviour to expect out of him, the major possibilities: he would just ignore me, he would apologize, or he would just act like nothing happened. I mentally shrugged, who cared? Oh, wait, I did. What kind of reaction would I give him? No idea.

He came and sat next to me. He took the remote and put his arm around my shoulder and then started flipping through the channels. Smoooth, with an extra o. He thought he could treat me like this? Boy, was he wrong. I shrugged out of his arm. I never ever had used any type of inappropriate language for Killua and nor was I planning to, but I think it was time for him to get a taste of his own medicine, if he could have mood swigs, why couldn't I? If he could get mad, why couldn't I?

"What's wrong?", he asked with the most innocent expression.

"Please don't touch me.", I said in a serious tone

His eyes widened and then he dropped his gaze. "I'm sorry.", he did look like he was sorry, but it was going to take alot more than that to fix things.

Gon stood up and went away, he knew these were serious matters. "Well, I'm not, I'm glad you showed me the real Killua."

"I wasn't.", he rushed through the words. "I'm really sorry, I was mad, I.."

He was at mid sentence when I stood up and headed upstairs. I was in the hallway when he caught my wrist. "Let go Killua.", I said without looking at him.

Instead of saying anyhting he just picked me up and carried me bridal style to his room. "Let go!", I started kicking him, he caught me in a tight grip, I bit his arm, no use. He was made out of steel. He enetered the room and closed the door with a backward kick. He dropped me on the bed and went to lock the door.

"Let me go.", I warned him.

"No.", he said in a flat voice. "Make me."

At that moment it all came back to me, back at the arena, he had caught me by the wrist and he had given me the same answer to the same words I told him back then. My heart beat sped-up, but not in the way it always did when I was with him, this time I was scared. My breathing was heavy, I watched him as he approched the bed. I closed my eyes and tightly gripped the sheets.

"Listen to me.", his voice was soft.

I clentched my teeth. "No."

"Claire, we can do this the easy way or the hard way.", his voice was threatening.

I was no match for him, I knew it very well. But there was no damn way I would let him treat me like this. I stared at the floor and shook my head. "No way."

He was gripping the side of the bed. I heard something break. I froze. He got on the bed and pushed me back, I fell on the bed with my head on the pillow. My eyes widened. He placed both his palms on either side of my face. He was all over me. His face was just a few inches away, "Come again?"

I was speechless and breathless. To be more precise, I was terrified.

"That's like a good girl."

I put my hand on my face covering my eyes. I was about to cry. I'm sure he figured that out.

"Will you listen to me?", his voice was soft again.

I nodded. He got off me. I removed my hand from my face. He was sitting to my side. He patted his lap, inviting me. I was scared of him, but he was the one I needed the most right now. He was the problem and the solution, the disease and the antidote. I crawled onto him. He kissed my cheek.

"I'm sorry.", his voice was apologetic and sweet. "I really shouldn't have talked to you that way, it's just that I was tensed and worried."

I remained silent and looked down to my hands.

"Yesterday.", he continued, "When we went to Mr. Battera, his game squad leader, Mr. Tsezguerra was there too. He told us that if we wanted to enter the game, and survive, we needed to be specialized in controlling our nen. When we performed ren infront of him, he told us that, we were nowhere near what it took. I was practicing yesterday.", he admitted, "I was practicing my nen ability, me and Gon still have to figure out what type of ability we want and we have to specialize it and the auditions for the Greed Island players are just two days away, you understand don't you? I was stressed, but still, I had no right to talk to you like that and I apologize once again."

I pursed my lips. "It's okay.", I knew I would have forgiven him even if he had no excuse. I got off him, "You should practice, I'd better go.", I got off the bed and headed to the door.

"Wait."

"Yeah?"

He came to me and took my hand. "I was going to Gon's room, wanna come?"

I rubbed my forehead, "I don't know I should.."

"Great.", he interrupted me, "Let's go."

I sighed and followed him.

People could be stubborn, but not as stubborn as Killua Zoldyck, people could be bossy, but not as bossy as Killua Zoldyck, people could be short-tempered, but not as short-tempered as Killua Zoldyck. That was just who he was, when he wanted something, he would get it, that was how he rolled.

Killua knocked the door of Gon's room.

"Come in!", said Gon in his bright voice.

Killua opened the door, put his arm around my waist and dragged me inside.

"Hey, any progress?", Killua asked.

"Uh..no.", said Gon scratching his head.

"What's wrong?", I felt sorry for Gon, he looked like he had just gone through a week of sleepless nights.

"I'm confused.", Gon admitted smiling sheepishly. "Killua's already figured out what kind of ability he wants, I've got no ideas."

I turned to Killua raising my eyebrow, "What's you're nen ability?"

He smirked. "It's a secret.", he faced Gon, "Look Gon just picture something in your head, something your interested in, it can be defensive or offensive, that also depends on your nen type, you're an enhancer, so you can use your aura to either attack or defend yourself."

Gon closed his eyes in an attempt to focus. After ten seconds he face palmed and froze.

"Gon?", I asked worried. No answer. "Killua what's wrong with him?"

Killua shook his head and sighed, "Brain fry."

I rolled my eyes and turned to Gon. "You know, you should got and ask Kurapika, he gives great advice."

Gon removed his hand from his face and both Gon and Killua looked at me like I was a mentally retarded person. It felt embarassing

"That's great! Thanks Claire, I'll go right now.", and in a second Gon was out of the room.

I blinked.

"Kurapika gives great advice?", Killua asked raising his eyebrow.

"Yeah, he does."

"What advice did he give you?"

"To improve my taste in boys."

His eyes narrowed, he believed me.

I giggled and went out the door. He followed.

"No, seriously, what did you ask him?"

"I'm not telling you."

"Come on, I'll just assume it's something bad."

"Be my guest."

I opened the door to my room and entered, I expected him to follow, when he didn't I cocked my head out of the door. He was standing outside. I made a questioning expression.

"Can I come in?", he asked in the most innocent voice.

I grabbed a hand full of his shirt from where I was standing and pulled him closer, our faces just a few inches from each other, "Since when do you ask?"

"Since now.", he was leaning in.

I put a hand on his lips. "Wait, can I ask you something?"

"Since when do you ask you can ask?"

I rolled my eyes, I closed the door and then turned to him. "Have you ever kissed anyone other than me?"

His eyes widened and then he smirked. "You should have said how many..", he said making a playful expression.

I glared at him.

His expression turned serious. "You're the first girl I ever kissed in my life."

"First girl, eh? So you've kissed boys?", I chuckled. I was trying to hide the relief I felt.

"If a guy as hot as me would be gay, it would be such a waste."

I rolled my eyes. "Who were you staring at the auction?"

I had definately caught him off guard, he froze. "What?"

"Don't act innocent, tell me."

"You don't need to know, trust me."

"Are you sure?"

"Positive."

"Do you like girls older than you?"

His serious expression turned into a smirk. He walked towards the bed and sat down.

"Umm... yeah."

"Killua!"

He laughed, and raised his arms in surrender, "I like girls a year, two months and five days younger than me."

I couldn't help but smile.

"Did I mention two hours and five minutes?"

"Get out."

Shock crossed his face, "What?"

"You said that the auditions are in two days right? Get the hell out of here and go practice your nen ability."

He pursed his lips. "What do I have to do to get a kiss?"

I smiled. "Hm..", I made a thoughful expression, "What are you willing to do?"

"Umm.. I'll kiss you?"

I grabbed his hand and pulled him off the bed and the pushed him out of the door, "Go.", I ordered and pecked him on the lips.

He raised his eyebrows, "That's not a kiss..", I shut the door and leaning my head against it I smiled.

I kicked my sheets off, it was too hot. I had been trying to sleep for the past four hours and it was 2 am now, but still I was no where near being sleepy. I groaned. I told myself it was because I got up late this morning, yeah must have been that. Oh, who was I kidding, I was lying to myself and I knew that very well. The only reason I couldn't sleep was because Killua was absolutely right, I was missing him, I needed him, he was like a teddy or maybe like a favourite blankie. There were two reasons why I didn't go to him. One, he might be asleep or he might be practicing, and two if I did go and he wasn't either busy or asleep he'd think I was desperate, which ofcourse, I was, but I didn't want him to know that.

Not only did I need him to sleep with me, I mean next to me. Huh. But I also needed to kiss him, very bad. The only reason I controlled myself this morning was because I knew once we started I would crave more, and well we didn't want that to happed, did we?

I got off the bed and out of my room with my pillow in my arms, I had no idea what I was about to do. It was instinct maybe that drove me towards Killua. Sometimes I felt like there was some kind if gravity connecting me to him.

I was standing right outside his door, the lights were off. He must have been sleeping. I didn't want to disturb him so I just turned around. Behind me the door opened.

"Going somewhere?", Killua's voice was heavy with sarcasm, I knew he was in a playful mood.

"Um.. yeah, to my room.", I spoke with my back to him.

"Why are you carrying your pillow around like that?"

"Uh.. because..."

"Because?"

"I was going to..", I sighed. "Oh, who am I kidding, I've got nothing."

Killua laughed. "Camila.", his voice was serious.

Camila? "Yeah?"

"Why don't you stay in my room tonight?"

I bit back a smile. He was trying not to make me feel uncomfortable. "If you insist.", I turned around and walked past him into his room.

I threw my pillow on the bed and crawled into the sheets. This felt good.

He raised an eyebrow, "Make yourself at home."

I yawned lightly.

He got on the bed and lied down right next to me. "I was thinking, you know."

"You were thinking huh? Let's just hope they've got a nobel prize ready."

He ignored what I said,"I was thinking that if you can't get enough of me just cause you've slept next to me one night, imagine what's gonna happen when you actually sleep with me."

I froze.

"Speechless, eh?"

"Don't."

"What?"

"Stop, we're not talking about this.", I said hiding my face in the sheets.

I could almost HEAR the delivish grin that broke on his face. "Why?"

"Killua.", I warned.

"Killua what? Sleep with me?"

I groaned.

He chuckled, he was having a blast.

There was a long silence.

"Killua, are you asleep?", no answer. "Killua.", still nothing. I crawled onto him. He opened his eyes.

"So, you don't wanna talk about it, but you wanna do it?"

"Killua!"

"Okay, okay.", he laughed.

"Kiss me."

He raised an eyebrow, "Umm...too sleepy.", he said and closed his eyes.

I rolled my eyes, there was no way I could get some sleep without kissing him first. I grabbed his hair, and crashed my lips onto his. His eyes opened wide. His hands slid to my back and he held me tight. His lips were moving in perfect sync with mine. When he broke the kiss I sighed, I wanted to go on all night, but thank Gon one of us was resposible. I got off him.

"Good night Killua."

He pulled me closer to him and lightly kissed my lips. "Good night Camila.", Camila, didn't sound so bad when he said it, but after all, everything he said sounded good, that was just the way he was, perfect.

12 pm. I was bored out of my mind. Both the boys were locked in their rooms. Kurapika was asleep and Leorio went groccery shopping. Wonderful. I started kicking the arm of the sofa just for something to do. The third time I kicked it..

BAM! I heard a blast that knocked the breath out of me. I looked around me. It came from upstairs. I ran to the hallway, I was sure this was Gon. I hurriedly opened the door of his room. I saw Gon lying exhausted on the floor, a huge crack on his wall. My eyes widened.

"Gon?", I shouted.

He turned to me and grinned widely. He got up and caught me into a tight hug.

"I...can't breathe.", I gasped. Was he okay?

He let go of me, "Sorry.", he was still smiling.

"What just happened?", I sounded like a mom. Woah.

"I did it! You were right, Kurapika does give great advice!"

"So he helped you figure out your nen ability?"

"Um.. sort of."

"What is it?"

His smile turned apologetic. "Sorry, it's a secret."

I groaned. "What is wrong with you boys? I'm outta here.", I walked out of the room. This was so annoying. Wow great, now all that was left to do was have a sarcastic conversation with myself.

Whitout realizing it, I bumped hard into someone's chest. I recognized the scent at once, Killua. He caught me.

"Uh.. hey?"

He smiled. "Hey.", Pheww, he was in a good mood. "What's going on? I just heard an explosion from somewhere."

"Uh.. that's Gon. He's practicing his nen ability.", I was talking his lips, I couldn't help it.

He raised an eyebrow. "What are you doing?"

I dropped my gaze, "Getting bored."

"Don't worry.", he said in a reassuring tone. "You can kiss me as much as you want once we're done with the auditions.", he winked.

I stopped breathing, did he just wink at me? I looked away. He was shameless. I was about to walk past him.

"One more thing.", he said.

I turned around. "Yeah?"

"I want you in my room tonight, got it?"

I nodded. I felt a warm feeling inside, that was all I needed. I felt like I won the lottery or something. Now even if I was getting bored atleast I had something to look forward to. I was so happy I felt like whistling, except that I didn't know how to.


	8. Chapter 8

Hey guys! I'm sorry I didn't update sooner but I was really busy! Thanks for the reviews and follows and I love each and everyone of you :D. Okay, so the ending of this chapter is sort of a... shocker... but please don't jump to conclusions! This chapter is dedicated to you Lani! Cause you insipired me and helped me so much! Thank you to all of you for reading :) . Follow me on twitter for updates! I'm SmileyBasma.

Chapter: 8

"Elecric shocks."

The basic rule for a peaceful life is balancing someone's importance in our life with our importance in theirs.

I sighed as I looked at myself in the mirror. Your boyfriend invited you to spend the night in his room, what does one wear for something like this? Okay, so I slept in his room last night too, but it wasn't like I knew I was going to. I groaned and decided to take a shower instead of worrying over nothing.

After the hot shower I tied the towel around myself and got out to get dressed. I was confused, what would be better a blue t-shirt or a pink tank top? I used the ultimate eenie meenie technique and ended up with the pink tank and white sweats. I spread my wet hair over my shoulders. Then suddenly another question popped up in my mind. Was I supposed to go early like 8 or 9? Or late in the night, like after 12? I rolled my eyes at myself. I felt so stupid and there was no doubt I was. I glanced at the clock, fixed 7:30. I bit my lip. He had an audition tomorrow morning, so would he practice til late night, or go early to bed? I felt like hitting my head on a wall. Great Claire, or Camila? Wow, I didn't even have a real name anymore, he could just go ahead and call me CeeCee if he wanted to.

I hated myself, I was way too insecure, reason? All the times my mom told me I was a good for nothing still played fresh in my mind, including my brother telling me I was useless and well all the doubt I had accumulated throughout my life, all these things had created a shy, insecure and self concious person.

Whenever I saw myself in the mirror, I never saw a confident and determined girl, I wasn't pretty, maybe average, both inside out, maybe not even that. I sighed. Shut up Claire.

I brushed my teeth and blow dried my hair. When there was absolutely nothing left to do I grabbed my pillow and got out of the room.

I took in a deep breath. I was outside his room. Knock already. Wait, don't, he might be busy. I knocked lightly at his door. Nothing. Maybe he was asleep, yeah that must have been it. He might have forgotten, but it was alright, I mean come on, only a person as dumb as me would get worried and excited over something so small.

I felt like I would crumble into pieces at any moment. How pitiful. I was so dumb and though I knew it very well that it was stupid to have expectations from people, I always did. Instead of going back to my room I just sat down by his door. I leaned my head against the wall and closed my eyes. "Good night Killua.", I whispered. Somewhere in the middle of that, I fell asleep.

Someone touched me. I opened my eyes at once.

"Killua?"

"Sorry, I woke you up, didn't I?", his expression was apologetic.

"Uh.. no, I wasn't asleep.", I looked around. I was on his bed.

He made an awkward expression, "Right, you were snoring like batman but you weren't asleep."

My eyes widened, he was lying, I didn't snore. "I don't snore."

He giggled. "Okay, you don't snore, but.", he raised his finger. "You do talk in your sleep."

I gasped. I did, and not just sometimes, I did it alot. "What? What did I say?"

He smirked. "Something about blue and cupcakes."

I bit my lip. Cupcakes? I waved my hand up and down. "Whatever, since when does batman snore?"

He rolled his eyes. "Since when am I so hot?"

I raised my eyebrows.

"Since forever.", he whispered.

"What time is it?"

"10pm."

"What? Are you serious?"

"Yeah, and why were you sleeping outside on the floor?"

I pursed my lips. "I like floors."

He chuckled. "You like me too, but you don't sleep on me."

I burried my face in my hands.

"Or should I say with me?"

I looked at him, I was planning to glare at him, but he looked so happy and beautiful I felt like melting. I saw this Killua very rarely, and I didn't want him to go away so quickly. "Sure."

He raised both his eyebrows and gripped the sheets in shock. "Wha-what?"

"What? Nothing.", I said as I realized what I just said. I face palmed and shook my head. I was such an idiot.

He relaxed and threw his head back on the pillow and stared at the ceiling. "Two things I don't know about you, go."

"Umm..", I thought carefully. "I'm italian and this isn't my natural hair colour."

He immediately turned to me. "What?"

"Uh.. I said I'm italian and..."

"No.", he interrupted me shaking his head. "How come I don't know that about you?"

"Well, you asked me to tell you two things about me you didn't know.."

"Yeah..but I thought you would come up empty."

I shrugged. "I'm sorry, I didn't think this was important."

"Everything about you is important."

I smiled.

"You're italian? That's why your surname sounds like a vegetable."

I rolled my eyes. "Hilarious."

"No, seriously it sounds like asparagus."

I glared at him.

"So basically.", he said in a serious tone. "I'm dating a seniorita?"

"More of a signorina actually.", I corrected him.

"What's your natural hair colour?"

"Black."

He examined my hair carefully. He caught a lock of my hair and twisted it around his finger.

Without realizing it, I was staring at his lips... again..

He leaned forward and very gently put his lips on mine, he never kissed me like this before, it was like this kiss was conveying some sort of secret message, was he trying to tell me something?

He broke the kiss and leaned back down on the pillow closing his eyes.

I stared at his face for a long moment, he looked thoughtful, like something was bothering him. He didn't look like he wanted to talk about it, and I didn't want to bother him.

"Good night Killua.", no answer. Was he already asleep? He had a long day ahead of him. "Sleep tight.", I whispered and closed my eyes.

"Ughh..", Killua groaned as he tried to put his shirt on.

I giggled.

"Man, should have kept my alarm on, we're gonna be late."

I watched him as he circled around the rom grabbing his stuff. "We'll be back before lunch, okay?"

I nodded.

"Call me if there's any problem. Ask before opening the door and remember keep it locked."

I rolled my eyes.

"I'm serious.", he warned.

"Killua, I'm not a kid."

"I know, you're worse."

I walked to him and straightened the collar of his shirt. "You look pretty."

"I know.", he said in a casual tone.

There was something different about him today and I just couldn't put my finger on it. I stared carefully at his face. As our gazez met his lips started moving towards mine. I closed my eyes. About five seconds passed and I realized nothing happened. I peaked through my eye lashes. Killua was gone.

My palms started sweating. I felt so embarassed. This was a really awkward situation. I bit my lip. What was wrong with him? Was he mad at me? I walked out of the room and went down stairs.

"Wish us good luck!", Gon said as soon as he saw me.

I smiled. "You don't need it."

He grinned. Killua stood silent and thoughtful next to him.

I waved them goodbye as they got out of the door. I sighed. Killua's mood shifts were getting on my nerves, what was wrong with that boy?

Life was a mess these days. The boys were ignoring me because they were busy I was glad the auditions would be over today, Leorio was rarely ever in the house and Kurapika was leaving tomorrow. I had to admit I would miss him...alot. He was like the older brother or the father I had but didn't have.

My studies were going pretty good and I had one week left before the exams. I counted the days in my head, it had been exactly two months since I left home. I knew Killua since almost sixty days, enough to figure a person out, I knew everything about him, yet I was nowhere near knowing him. The way he behaved it lead me to think that there were two souls in one body, he was kind-hearted person, there was no doubt in that, but he also was the type of person that didn't change, and didn't compromise. Lucky for him I loved him enough to agree with everything he said and did.

I knew to deal with a person like him a lot of patience was required and I would try my best because in my heart I knew I needed him more than he needed me, without him I would probably break, if he left me right now...no, he wouldn't and I didn't even dare to think about it.

The apartment was empty, except Kurapika was in his room, but he was probably busy or something. I sat down on the rug in the living room and played cards with myself. I named one side of myself Claire and the other Camila. I made Camila win on purpose...because...well she was Killua's, no? It was funny how Killua could have such an impact on my life, it was like my world revolved around him and at times I felt helpless, but in an amazing kind of way. I knew this was just a dumb game, it wasn't even a real game, but just having the slightest idea of what Killua would have preffered completely changed my prespective on everything.

I shook my head, I was probably going crazy. I went to my room and started arranging my pairs of socks just for something to do. One of the craziest things about me was that I only wore mismatched socks. Crazy but true. To me socks were like people, so a pair of socks was like a couple, and couples could never consit of people who were exactly the same so, the more different they were, the more comfortable I felt.

After dinner, I sat down on the couch and watched TV. I wanted to knock at Kurapika's door and beg him to chat with me but I rejected the idea, partly because I was sure he was busy and parly because I still had a bit of self-esteem left in me. I took out my cell phone and texted Killua.

"Where r u?"

After one minute my phone buzzed. "Almost at home."

I typed quickly. "How did the auditions go, have you guys passed?"

"Tell you when we get at home."

I groaned. Was he trying to create suspense? 'Cause it was totally working.

"Tell me now."

"No."

"Killua?"

No reply. I felt like throwing the phone out of the window. I ran to my room and locked the door. What a jerk. I took in deep breaths. Calm down Claire, you gotta make it work, you can make it work.

I went back downstairs and found Kurapika sitting on the couch watching TV.

He turned to me. "Hello."

"Hey.", my voice sounded dead, even to me.

"Did you and Killua fight again?"

"No, why? Why would we fight? Why would I be mad at him just cause he's been ignoring me since this morning? Wait, it doesn't even matter.", I said and folded my arms around my chest like a stubborn child, I really wanted to stick my toungue out, but not at him, at Killua.

Kurapika pursed his lips. "Okay..."

I sighed. "Kurapika why is everything so complicated?"

He made an apologetic expression, like this was somehow all his fault. "I don't know that but, everything happens for a reason right?"

"What's the reason for all of this?"

"Well, you two argue alot, but everytime you make-up, you get closer, no?"

I raised an eyebrow.

"Look at it this way, would you rather keep fighting with him and be in this awkward situation you always are, or would you rather he'd go away and you could have some peace in your life?"

My eyes widened. "No, he can't go."

Kurapika nodded. "See? That's how this works."

I started biting my nails.

The door knocked. I was sure it was the boys. Kurapika stood up and went to let them in. As he turned around the corridor, I saw him, he looked flawless, as he always did. Killua Zoldyck, the center of my orbit, the cause of my problems and the answer to every question. The way he carried himself, he didn't look like he was fifteen, he was perfect in every way, he was like air to me.

His eyes were sad, but his gaze was serious. Behind him a cheerful and excited Gon was talking enthusiastically to Kurapika. Poor Gon, Kurapika hadn't yet told him he was leaving tomorrow. Gon's eyes lit up as he saw me.

"Guess what?"

I couldn't help but smile at his excited tone. "What?"

"We passed.", he said as he showed me a file.

"What's that?"

"Oh, this is just the contract."

"For what?"

"When we go in the ga..."

"Shut up Gon.", Killua interupted him.

He was definately in a bad mood.

"Sorry.", Gon said in an apologetic tone. These boys were impossible.

Killua sat next to me. His fingers lightly touched my hand. I immediately drew my hand back shivering, not because I was mad at him, but because it felt like electricity had just passed through me, like his fingers caused an electric shock. He looked at me surprised. I dropped my gaze. What just happened? Did I just imagine it? Probably.

"Come on.", he said. "Time to go to bed."

This was so annoying, he was treating me like I was a child and he was supposed to babysit me. I rolled my eyes.

I went to my room. I changed into my pijamas and brushed my teeth. After that I took my pillow and headed to where I belonged, in Killua's bed. He was in an awful mood, but he had clearly told me to spend the night in his room and no matter how mad I was at him there was no way I would refuse to that.

As I enetered his room I saw him reading something carefully. He lifted his gaze and looked at me.

"Hi."

He nodded. Still in a bad mood I guessed.

I went to sit on the bed. I put my cell phone on the side table and stared at the ceiling. After a while my phone buzzed. I checked it. It was a text, from Killua.

"Good night."

It was infuriating. He was sitting inches away from me, would it be so bad if he just said that to me, right here, to my face? I didn't reply instead I just sighed heavily, so he would hear. Jerk.

I closed my eyes and tried to get some sleep, thinking about him would just cause me a mental disorder, and tomorrow we were supposed to drop Kurapika at the airport.

I was continously asking him to stop, but he just wouldn't listen. "Killua!", I watched him as he walked on like he hadn't heard a word. The tears in my eyes made my vision blurry. Just when I thought things couldn't get any worse, I saw it, how could I have been so blind? A thick trail of blood that grew as Killua walked on. I lost my breath, my legs felt like they were made out jelly.

"Oh, God! Killua please stop!"

I looked around me. I was in a dark room. The next moment someone's arms were around me. I gasped.

"Shh", Killua whispered. "It's okay, you're fine."

"You're bleeding.", I told him, tears in my voice.

His hand rubbed my back. "It was just a dream, go back to sleep."

I nodded to myself. I felt like an idiot. I closed my eyes again and Killua's arms tightened around me. I felt that electric shock, again, but it wasn't as strong as before so, I didn't react. As long as he touched me, I knew I wouldn't have any nightmares, he was my dream catcher.

8 am, we were at the airport. Gon's usually bright eyes were dull and sad. Seeing him this way made me want to cry. Killua was standing in a dark corner, still ignoring me, like what happened last night, didn't happen at all. Jerk.

"You've got a very even heartbeat.", Melody told Leorio. "You should be a doctor or a teacher."

Me and Leorio both smiled.

"Okay, it's time to go.", Kurapika told Melody.

She nodded and walked to him.

"I'll se you guys soon.", Kurapika said as he looked at all four of us.

He shook Leorio and Killua's hand and caught Gon in an awkward one-armed hug. Then he came to me and smiled holding out his hand so I would shake it. I stared repeadtedly between his hand and his face.

"Kurapika, I'll miss you."

He put his arms lightly around me. "Trust me, we'll see each other very soon."

I nodded. As soon as he let go of me and turned to Melody someone caught me by the back of my shirt and pulled me backwards.

"What the?"

It was Killua. His eyes were murderous and his jaw was clentched. His arm wo so tight around me it hurt. He was definately mad at something, or at someone maybe. I doubted that it was humanly possible to understand Killua's mood shifts. Maybe he had a world of his own in that brain of his. I looked at his face carefully. There were light circles below his eyes, like he hadn't slept well for days, and he looked a bit pale. Was he sick? I could only ask these questions to my self and assume the answers, I was too chicken to interrogate him because I didn't want to have anything to do with this killer version of Killua.

"Killua you're hurting me.", Literally.

What I said might have been more effective if I would be talking to a solid concrete wall but with Killua, not so much. I sighed. There was no need to make a scene infront of all these people. I freed one of my arms and waved Kurapika and Melody goodbye as they headed forward.

It was a few minutes later when we were in the car. Leorio was driving, Gon next to him on the passenger seat. Killua and I were at the back seat, one of his arms was tight around my waist while he was clutching the leather seat tightly with his other hand.

"Let's go for ice-cream.", Leorio suggested trying to cheer Gon up.

I saw Gon's eyes brighten for a moment.

"No.", Killua said in his murderous/assasin/killer tone. Or what I liked to call his MAK tone.

There was no further argument from anyone's part, nobody wanted to see Killua's ugly side right now.

It was exactly 8:52 am when we entered the apartment. Gon and Leorio went to their respective rooms, I was planning to do the same but the boy or the MAK holding my hand had no intentions of letting me go.

He was heading to his room towing me behind. At the moment I felt invisible or like his dog, who he was taking on its daily walk. Or simply, I felt like a bitch. Awkward.

"Killua?"

He didn't even spare me glance. He opened the door to his room. I entered and he locked it, this happened on a daily basis, but somehow I was scared to be alone with him, in his room, in his room which he had just locked and I could even picture him swallowing the key, just like they did on TV.

As he turned, I saw something in his eyes. It was a mixture of fear, sadness and hunger. My heart beat sped up for no reason. Suddenly he caught both my wrists and pushed me against the wall, he wasn't trying to hurt me, he barely applied any force. His lips crashed on mine, and I welcomed them. This kiss felt wild, he wasn't stopping and I was gasping for air. I tried to push him back, but in vain. What was wrong with him? Was he trying to kill me? After about ten seconds he let go. I exhaled as deeply as I could, my head was spinning I felt like I would faint at any moment.

I never thought something could bring so much pleasure and so much pain at the same time. I was breathing heavily. He kissed me once again, this kiss was even more agressive than the first one. As soon as he broke it, I felt dizzy.

"Killua sto.."

His lips silenced mine. His hands moved to my hair. I never saw this side of Killua, and no matter how good it felt, I was scared. I stopped kissing him back and pressed my lips tightly together. Finally his lips moved away from mine.

"What the hell is wrong with you!", I said through heavy breaths.

He grabbed my arm and dragged me to the bed. He pushed me back and cupped my face. My eyes widened. Again his lips collided with mine. I moved both my hands to his hair and tried to pull them out of the roots, but he was completely made of steel, his skin was just an excuse to prove he was human, which I doubted he was and neither did he feel anything. Tears started streaming down my cheeks, I felt helpless. His eyes widened, I was sure, because I felt his eyelashes stroke my forehead. He let go.

"Stop!", I said through sobs. "Stop it."

"Don't.", he said wiping the tears off my face. "Please don't cry."

"Please don't make me."

"I.. I didn't mean to hurt.."

"But you did and always do.", I interrupted. "Killua kissing isn't going to make everything okay. You can't be one version on your self in one second and the other in the next. This is not how relations work, me compromising and being patient and you doing whatever the hell you feel like doing."

He frowned. "I'm sorry."

"If you really are, then show me, don't just say it everytime."

"I really am, but you'll hate me."

"What are you talking about?"

"I can't...", he turned his gaze elsewhere.

"Killua what is it? Tell me."

"We can't, we can't go on like this."

My heart felt like it would explode at any moment. "What, are you, are you breaking up with me?"

He sighed. "Yes."


	9. Me too

Hey guys! I'm so so sorry I didn't update sooner! Okay so the last chapter, mmm, the reviews, I'm so sorry! Alot of you were just like, heart broken, I know, I'm an idiot but I'm sorry. Just trying to create so suspense. Anyways this chapter is, ummm, read it and tell me! And after this the story is going to get interesting, so stick around, I'll update in a week or two. Thanks again for the reviews, love you guys, you're owsum!

Chapter: 9

"Me too."

Forget what hurt you, but never forget what it taught you.

Life. I started hating this word since the day I turned ten. Not just because of the fact that I found myself alone on my bed room floor, lighting up an blowing off a match stick and singing happy birthday to myself, but because that was the very day I realized what I meant to my family, the importance I had, it was awkward to say, but I felt like peanuts. People take out what they need and leave the shell empty, and most of the time they crush it. That was exactly how I was when I left home, empty. I thought there was no kind of pain I didn't experience, and no kind of pain I couldn't deal with, I thought I was left numb, but boy was I wrong. I guess I forgot that my shell was only empty, not crushed.

"Yes.", the word came out like poison from the very lips I loved and craved. He could have stabbed me in the heart with a dagger and I would have felt better.

I was in that part of life, I was sure that if I said, "Atleast it's not raining." It probably would. My life in that very moment felt like a desk where people only sticked chewed gum. I felt like that nerd with a crack in her glasses, because she got punched in the face once, who had to do the bully's homework.

I nodded to myself, as if doing that would chase all my problems away and I would wake up from this nightmare. My heart was beating unevenly in my chest, like I had just swallowed a dozzen ice cubes. The five seconds that had passed seemed like eternity, I wanted to jump out of the window and maybe disappear somewhere with the wind.

"Oh." was all I could manage to say.

Somehow the room started shaking. Killua's apologetic expression turned into a horror - struck one which made me realize that it wasn't the room that was shaking, it was me.

In the next second his hands were on my face. "What the.. don't, shh."

"I'm fi-ne.", my voice broke at the end.

He took a deep breath. "Let me explain.", he held one finger out.

I managed to lift my trembling head up and then drop it back down, which was a very bad interpretation of a nod.

His hands moved away from my face and wrapped around my fingers. He lifted my right hand up to his lips and kissed it lightly.

"Tell me.", he said in a serious tone. "When we told you about the game, Greed Island, and the auditions and everything, what exactly did you think it was?"

His question made me realize that I never actually thought about it. "I don't know.", I said slightly shivering.

He nodded. "You probably thought it was a CD and we had to pass the auditions so we could bring it home and play it on the plasma screen in the Tv room downstairs, right?"

I lifted my gaze and met his.

He pursed his lips. "But it's not. Why do you think we had to practice hatsu for it?"

Too many questions and way too many confusing answers, I would probably end up having a brain fry like Gon.

"We're leaving.", he said. "Me and Gon.", he clarified.

I digged my nails into my palms.

"Greed Island, it's like a virtual world, and that contract you saw, it's an agreement. It says every item we retrieve from the game belongs to Mr. Battera and..", he looked away.

"And?", uhh I hated the suspense.

"If we die inside the game, Mr. Battera won't be held resposible."

I gasped. "Die?", I said an octave higher than necessary.

"We're gonna be fine.", he assured me. "But, we have no idea how long we'll stay in there, a year, two, maybe even more."

I started biting my nails.

"That's why I... I want you to be free, you're not bound to wait for me, though my heart will always belong to you, and you only."

That was when it all clicked into place. I was such an idiot, I doubted him, how could I?

"You know what they say.", he said. "If you really love something let it go, if it comes back to you, it's yours, if not, it was never meant to be."

My eyes started pricking. Even with the tears forming, I managed a smile. "I'll always come back to you.", I told him, "Even if you push me away."

His eyes lit up. "A year isn't a joke.", he said in a serious tone, "You might even get over me."

"You.", I pointed at him. "Might get over me."

His eyes turned solid. "The chances of that are lower the probability that Gon might become good at maths, and trust me.", he smirked. "That's not gonna happen."

I bit back a giggle.

He smiled.

"When-when are you leaving?", I asked.

He took a deep breath.

"Killua?"

He looked away.

"Killua Zoldyck!"

"Tomorrow morning."

A week. I thought we atleast had a week. "Oh..", I looked at the floor trying to avoid his eyes. A long silence followed.

"Say something.", his voice was apologetic.

"Uhh... I just... didn't expect it to be so soon.", I admitted.

"I.. know, I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner."

I nodded.

I threw my head back on the pillow and sighed not out of relief, but pity, for my self, for how desperately I needed him.

"Will you be okay?", he asked.

"Yeah.", I said as convincingly as I could.

"You know I could stay if you.."

"Don't even think about it.", I interrupted him. "Killua, Gon needs you way more than I do right now.", I lied, nobody could need him more than me and I coated it with a "Trust me.", to make it sound real.

"Are you gonna stay here?"

"Uh, I don't know yet, but I'll figure something out, don't worry."

"You can move on you know.", he said it like he wanted the total opposite of that.

"Great.", I said sarcastically. "I already have someone in mind."

"Yeah, but don't blame me if he dies of some unexpected accident on the exact day I come back."

I rolled my eyes. "I'll keep that in mind.", I assured him.

"Okay, now the serious stuff.", he said and took a deep breath. "Will you go out with me tonight?"

His question was so unexpected I froze. We had never gone out together, ever. "Go out? With you?", I asked surprised.

"Nah, I don't think Santa brings age before beauty."

"Funny."

"Answer me.", he ordered.

"Where are you going to take me?", I asked trying to mask my curiousity.

"Umm.. to the fair? Win you a teddy bear? Get you some cotton candy and come back home?"

"Don't people usually go to the movies on their first date?"

His expression turned thoughtful. "Okay, a movie sounds fine. What do you wanna watch, horror?"

"No.", I answered too quickly. That was a reflex to scary stuff which had blood involved.

He raised his eyebrow.

"Hello? Afraid of blood..."

"Oh.", he said. "I forgot."

"Ofcourse you did."

His expression turned disguisted. "Uhh, not romance, please.", he begged.

"Oh, no, please I like throwing up after kissing scenes.", I said rolling my eyes.

He nodded in relief. "I want you ready at seven, sharp."

"Okay.", I said excited.

He crawled closer to me and burried his face in my hair, I could feel his hot breath on my neck.

"You know.", I said.

"Uhmm."

"I usually feel this electric shock when you touch me."

He giggled.

"What? I'm not lying."

"Oh, I know.", he said like I was missing something totally obvious.

"Do you have any theories about it?"

"Eternal love.", he said sarcastically.

I passed my fingers through his hair, they were so soft.

He took my other hand and lightly stroked it with his pinky.

My whole frame buzzed all of a sudden and I started feeling dizzy. My eyes widened. "So it was you all along?"

He chuckled, his lips touching my throat.

"Electricity? That's your hatsu?", I asked surprised.

"Mmm."

It was just about ten minutes ago, I felt like hell, like I had lost every single reason to be alive, and here we were now, me and him, existing peacefully and being complete with each other. Life was like a puzzle. A single piece could make the entire thing look empty, Killua was that piece, not just that piece, he was every piece.

I could feel his even breathing on my throat. I kept stroking his hair, that's when I realized he fell asleep. Very carefully I shifted his head on my lap and kissed his cheek. He was absolutely adorable.

He was the boy who was raised to kill, but wanted to love and I wanted to give back, even more than he gave me, but that felt impossible because if the bad side of Killua was too bad, his good side was too good, and even though it was hard for him to keep a balance, he was still perfect.

I watched his face carefully, memorizing every curve, every angle. I had no idea when I would get to see it again.

"It's 7:10.", Killua's voice woke me up from a weird dream.

I rubbed my eyes. "I like apples.", I said yawning.

"What?", he asked raising his eyebrows. He shook his head and sighed. "Nevermind, go get ready."

"For what?", I asked sleepily.

"Date... remember? Last day..."

"Oh.", I almost shouted. "Yeah.", I went to my room.

It was about ten minutes later that I was standing at the front door in my red collared shirt and black shorts. I glammed my look up a bit with a small black bow on my hair and my sparkly chain charms. I turned the light switch on and off just for something to do, Killua was taking too long. Usually girls took time getting ready, here we were in the exact opposite situation.

"Someone's looking pretty.", Killua said as he came down the stairs. His look was as casual as ever, a dark blue button down shirt and jeans. That shirt was hot. Why the hell did he take so long?

"Thanks.", I said examining him.

"I meant me.", he said, using both his hands to illustrate himself.

I nodded. "Your mom must be so proud."

He smirked. "More than you can imagine.", he winked.

I looked away, I was going to faint.

He walked to me and held his elbow out. "Shall we go m'lady?"

I rolled my eyes. "Let's go."

"Killua.", I said as we were standing outside the ticket booth at the movie theatre. "You have too choose one, either it's racing or vampires."

His brow was furrowed and he was thinking very hard. "Ugh.", he groaned. "You choose."

"Great then vampires it is."

Killua bought the tickets and the popcorn. We went inside and got seated.

"Killua.", I said. "You know this is an action slash romance movie right?"

"Mmm.", he was definately bored. "Girl falls in love with vampire bla bla."

I rolled my eyes.

"But you know.", he said in a seductive tone that got me on my guard. "Darkness and romance together make the perfect blend.", he said waving around him.

"What are you upto?"

"You'll see, oh, no you won't, you'll feel.", he said chuckling.

I gulped and turned my gaze to the screen.

"You know? I've never been to a cinema before."

I raised my eyebrows. "Seriously?"

"Yeah, I mean I was in the mansion the whole time, except when I went for missions and then after that I've been with Gon the whole time so."

"Keep it down.", someone said from the backseat.

There was a brief pause before Killua started talking again. Probably glared at him, I thought.

Killua yawned and then put his arm on my shoulder. I giggled. "Wow, what's gonna happed next? You're accidentally gonna kiss me while you were actually looking for your drink?"

He chuckled. "Possible."

I put my head on his shoulder and inhaled his scnet. The fabric of the shirt so soft, so perfect, so him.

"You can have it, you know?"

"What?"

"The shirt."

I pulled back, "Sorry."

There was a long silence. I was surprised, Killua actually got interested in the movie. Well, good for him. So much for darkness and romance.

"Did you like the movie?", I asked as we walked out of the hall.

"Mmm bearable."

I rolled my eyes. "Seriously? I thought I saw you drool."

He gave me a sarcastic expression and then smirked. "That was when I was looking at you."

I smiled in surprise and shook my head. "You're impossible."

"Where do you wanna have dinner?"

"Umm... I didn't know we were having dinner."

"You do now, now tell me."

"Your pick."

"Great, I know a decent place."

Killua opened the door to the restaurant he suggested in a very gentleman-ish way. The waiter took us to our table. Killua even pulled my chair back for me.

"Woah.", I said surprised. "Are you feeling okay?"

"Never been better."

We ordered and dug in.

"Who eats salad?"

"I do.", I said as I looked at his plate.

"Who eats dessert for dinner."

"I do."

"You know chocolate gives you pimples."

"I eat about twenty bars per week, do you see any pimples on my face?"

I examined his perfectly clear and smooth looking skin. He was right, his face was flawless.

He took my hand from under the table with one of his, while he put the other in his pocket as to take ut something. He fastened something on my wrist. I took my hand back and examined the sparkling object. It was a metal chain. It looked very delicate and it was beautiful. I noticed what I saw sparkling before. There was a shiny "K" on the other side of the chain.

"Wow, Killua it's beautiful."

He smiled and it was the most genuine smile I had ever seen. "Do you like it?"

I shook my head. "No."

He raised one eyebrow. "Love it?"

"Yeah.", I said giggling. "Thank you. I'm sorry I forgot to get you something."

"You promised me you would wait for me. What else would I want? To win the lottery?", he asked in a "You're crazy." manner.

"We should go home now, it's getting pretty late.", I said as I put my hand on the chair to stand up.

He put his hand on mind stopping me. "Home?", he asked raising an eyebrow. "The night is young."

I laughed. "So what? Stay out all night?"

"If you insist.", he said.

He took my hand and we walked out. We weren't precicely going anywhere, we were just going.

"This was the best night ever.", I told him as we walked, hand in hand.

He kissed my cheek. "You're happy, I'm happy."

The sweetest thing he had ever said, I couldn't help but smile. My heart was singing and I felt perfect. I mentally laughed at us. We were crazy. We annoyed each other like ten year olds and loved each other like we were in our fifties. If he ever lived to be a hundred, I hoped I would live a hundred minus one day so I would never have to live without him.

"Look, clovers.", he said pointing at the grass near the tree we were sitting under.

"Oooh.", I dug through them, "I hope I find a four-leafed one."

He chuckled. "I don't understand.", he said seriously.

"What?"

"I never found one in my life, then how did I get so lucky?"

My heart melted. I crawled into his lap and kissed him. Our lips were like parts of a two pieces puzzle, it was like they were made for each other, always in sync.

"What time is it?", I asked when I noticed the sky was changing colour.

"4 am."

"What?"

"Yeah, our new best, we made out for five hours non stop.", he said chuckling.

I rolled my eyes and grabbed his hand to lift him up. "Come on."

4:30 am, when we re-entered the apartment. We tip toed to his room.

"You need to rest, you're leaving in four hours.", I said when Killua said he wasn't tired.

"Exactly, I'm leaving in four hours, do you really want me to waste them sleeping?"

"Then what do you wanna do?"

"Do you really wanna know?", he said in a seductive tone.

"Not another word.", I warned him.

"Then talk to me."

"Are you scared?"

"Yeah."

"Really?", was it even possible?

"Yeah, even though you promised, I'm still scared I might lose you."

"Aww Killua, don't you trust me?"

"Ofcourse I do, I don't trust time."

I sighed. "I love you.", I said realizing this was the first time I ever said it. "I loved you yesterday, I love you today and I'll love you tomorrow and a hundred years from now."

His eyes widened. His put his arms around me and burried my face in his chest kissing my hair.

"I wish you would be flying somewhere so I could drop you off to the airport atleast.", I said as Killua unbuttoned his shirt.

"No, actually I'm glad.", he said.

I pursed my lips.

"Saying goodbye to you is one thing, watching you as I leave is another, I can't do it."

I sighed. "All packed?"

"Yeah."

"Let's go then."

"You'll be careful, right?"

Both the boys nodded.

"You'll behave, right?"

Killua groaned, "Stop being a mom, babies can't act like babysitters."

I glared at him. "You're leaving, be nice."

"Fine."

"Come on already!", Leorio said impatiently from the door.

I hastily hugged Gon and kissed his cheek. "Please be careful and come back home."

He grinned. "Don't worry. You can count on that.", he caught me in a bone crunching hug but I didn't complain, it felt good. "Bye!", he said throwing me a salute.

As Gon left Killua's arms were around me. He lightly pushed me back untill I was against the wall. And there it was. That kiss. The one I knew would be perfect yet horrible at the same time. This kiss was like the key and the cage. So perfect yet at the same time heart breaking. Who knew how long it would be untill this happened again, untill I could touch him like this again, untill I could feel his skin on mine. A light knock on door brought us both to reality. Like always it was never enough. As he let go he whispered, "Me too.", in my ear.

"What?", I said breathless.

"I love you too.", he took my hand and kissed it and then he was gone. He vanished.

I let go. I broke down. I let the tears out, the one's I had been holding since he told me it was over and the one's that were begging me to let them out when he said he was leaving. I had been holding them back for too long, if he saw just how deep the cut, the pain of him leaving was, I was sure he never would have left. I had been acting brave all along, but not because I wanted to, but because I had to.

I splashed the cold water from the basin on my face. Icy, that's how it felt. I placed my head under the rushing freezing water. The tears went away with it. I pulled back. My head started hurting like hell. "Please don't leave.", I whispered to myself as I sobbed. But this was just the beginning of my hell, who knew how bad it would get after.

His room. The only place that would give me some piece of mind. I slowly unlocked the door. The place looked deserted without him. My eyes widened as I saw his blue button down shirt neatly placed on the bed and on top of it a square piece of white paper.

I stroke the shirt and unfolded the note.

It was short, it was mine, it was perfect.

"Me too."


	10. Change

Hey guys! Surprise! I'm updating earlier :D. Okay, so I really worked hard on this chapter, please, please review! And I'm loving all the reviews for the previews chapter! Thaks Lani and thank you MadokaMagic for reviewing since the first chap, you're all amazing. This chapter is... read it and tell me. Once again, you're awesome, thank you! :)

Chapter: 10

"Change."

Change isn't always bad, sometimes you just become a better version of yourself.

Patience and determination. It you ever wanna be anything in life you gotta have these two in you. That's what I learned in the past year. I broke down and I started from scratch, but I forged myself into a new girl, a more determined and confident one. The doubt had almost completely washed away and I even managed to build up some ego. I was "The girl." and I finally found the light at the end of the tunnel.

I was sure that if I was ever sent back a year to have a chat with myself, I wouldn't recongnize the girl I called me a few months ago. Pain had helped me grow strong, and struggle had polished me, made me clearer, shinier.

My life was't perfect, that was for sure, but whose life is? There's always a flaw, always a hole, that can't be and won't be filled. What might matter to one person might seem worthless to another. Some crave money, some crave love, some crave... cats. Me? I only craved one thing, or one person I should say.

It's awkward when something is yours but you can't have it. It's like having a cat but being allergic to it. Why cats? No idea, though I hated cats more than anything in the world.

"The school prom.", the strawberry blonde standing infront of me said as she held the coloured flyer infront of me. Her green eyes were determined and desperate.

I examined the paper. Two sillhuoettes of a dancing couple and a cresent on top. I rolled my eyes. "Great, have fun."

"Claire!"

"What?"

"What is it with you and proms?"

"We don't have that spark.", I said nibbling on my muffin. "See? Me and this muffin, we have that spark."

She glared at me. "Come on please, this might be our last year together."

Back to emotional black mailing. I sighed. "Look Lil, me, a boy and dancing, in the same equation? Not gonna happen. I don't date."

28th March 2013. Lil's useless attempts of convincing me to go to prom every year were getting more and more annoying. We were sitting in the cafeteria having lunch. Eastern Padokia High. I settled here a month after Leorio moved to York New. Lil was one of the craziest people I knew. She got excited over nothing and prom was like an invitation to a sacred dance in heaven to her.

She groaned. "You know Will?"

I raised and eyebrow. "Who?"

"Will, the cute boy in the senior division."

"Mmm."

"He asked me to ask you if you wanted to go to prom with him."

I narrowed my eyes. "He asked you to ask me? Why didn't he just? You know what? Nevermind. Gross."

"He's scared of you, as a matter of fact every boy in the school is."

"Good for them, they should keep their distance.", I warned. "Did someone ask you?"

She sighed. "No."

"Then tell Bill..."

"Will."

"Yeah tell him that he should take you instead if he doesn't want his nose broken."

"I don't wanna go with him."

I raised an eyebrow. "Who is it?"

"You're gonna hate me."

"Spit it out."

"Your friend that lives near the arena is pretty cute.."

I laughed in disbelief. "No way."

"I know you like him, I'm sorry."

I face palmed. "Zushi and I are just friends."

"Well do you think he'd go out with me?"

"Yeah, it's worth a shot."

"Well could you ask him..."

"You're asking me to ask him if he would take you to prom?"

She lightly nodded.

"Okay, I'll try."

Her face lit up.

I smiled. Lil always made my day not so bad. She was like a burning fire in a living body, always so excited and full of spirit.

I lifted my wrist up and lightly spun he "K" charm attactched to my chain. Killua. It had been so long since I had last seen him. His lips, his scent, his hair, his skin everything was a faraway memory. I sometimes wondered if my brain had made him up. But I had his shirt and this bracelet he gave me before he left, and that was all the proof I needed.

"You're thinking about a boy.", Lil said waking me up from my day dream.

"No-o."

"You're lying."

The bell rang and saved me at the last minute. I was a terrible liar. I stood up taking my books and my bag.

"Where are you going?", Lil asked curiously.

"Locker."

"Kay, then guess I'll see you tomorrow."

"Yeah.", I waved her goodbye and headed for the hall where the lockers were.

I entered my code. The lock didn't open. "What the hell?", I tried again, still no use. I wanted to break it but that wouldn't look so facinating to the people standing to my sides. I sighed and gave up. "Fuck."

I walked outside and went to the main gate. I so badly wanted to break something today. I was just outside the parking lot when three boys with a bad taste in fashion blocked my way.

"Not so fast.", the one standing in the middle said. He was probably the leader. Slick black spikes and a tattoo on the arm. Bad attempt to look hot and aggressive.

"What?", I asked in a bored voice.

"Why don't you come with us, sugar? You'll have fun.", the two at the back, both blonds, nodded in agreement. The way they stood, their co-ordination, it reminded me of the three brothers I saw last year at the Hunter Exam. The memory made me chuckle.

"What's funny?"

"Move.", I said in the most serious voice I could manage.

All three laughed, a loud throaty laugh. "Whose gonna make us?"

This felt like those movie scenes in which when the villain asks this question, the hero suddenly appears out of nowhere saying "I am." and the damzel in distress rewards him with a kiss after his job's done. I sighed.

"Look, I'm not in a very awesome mood right now, move before you'll regret it.", I said as I tried to walk past them.

He raised his arm, again blocking my way. "What happened? Did your boyfriend dump you?"

That was it. I lost it. I grabbed his collar with one hand and slammed him against the wall. I clentched my other hand into a fist. I turned to the two boys at the back and glared at them, the MAK glare, I had learned from Killua. "Wouldn't even think about it if I were you, blondies.", they took a few steps back.

I turned to the boy infront of me. "I warned you. I had a really bad hair day, I got a B in my maths test, I forgot the code of my locker and if that wasn't enough, I'm officially pissed off now, because of you.", he gulped. "Let me give you a friendly advice, never mess with a girl, you never know when she might be in period.", I raised my fist, his eyes widened.

It was five minutes later when I was walking down the main street. I mentally slapped myself for what I just did back there, but that boy deserved it. I always went to the park after school and sat under the big shadowy tree but today I just felt like doing nothing. I walked past the arena and turned left.

Heaven's Arena. The first time I met Killua it was a year and six months ago. The way I accidentally met both boys, got to know them and then fell in love with one. Memories. They were so beautiful but they also brought pain, they reminded me of the moments I couldn't go back to. The fist time I talked to Killua, they way we used to fight, the first time we kissed, our first and last date.

I entered the first alley to the right. There it was, the three floored flat. I pushed the doors open and went to the stairs. My heels clicked against the marble stair case and the echoes of it were everywhere. Yup, I started wearing heels.

1 B. I pushed the familiar slightly rusty golden door knob open.

"Hey.", I said announcing my arrival.

"Welcome Claire-kun.", Wing-san greeted me in his polite tone.

"Wing m'man, how ya doin'?"

He raised his eyebrows.

"Too casual?"

He chcukled. "Come sit, would you like some tea?"

"No thanks, where's Zushi? Wait let me guess, still training?"

He nodded apologetically.

"I'll be in his room.", I said as I walked towards the last door in the hall.

I lightly knocked. No answer. I opened the door and found Zushi staring out of the window.

I sighed. "Atleast you're not training."

He turned to me and smiled. "Hey."

I went and sat next to him. "You know, you're gonna go crazy if you spend all your time doing the same damn thing."

"Practice makes perfect."

Zushi. Short cropped brown hair and bright hazel eyes. He reminded me of Gon in so many ways, especially in his determination. He was one of the best friends I had, easy to talk to, fun to have around.

"Seriously Zushi, it's not that big of a deal, you're gonna pass the Hunter Exam, trust me."

"Easy for you to say, hunter girl."

I rolled my eyes and raised my hands in surrender. "Not my fault, didn't as Killua to go on his assasin mode."

Last year's Hunter Exam was a disaster. Killua appeared out of nowhere a year ago and took me to the exam's location with the help of weird flying foxes. When we got there, there were about a thousand people. Most of them seemed to know Killua, including the trio of awkward brothers. The examiner told everyone to retrieve at least three badges to pass on to the first stage as there were too many participants this year, ofcourse Killua had to show off so he gathered all the badges except mine and the three I had taken by myself.

The examiner spoke to the chairman who promoted Killua but told me that if I wanted to pass I had to fight Killua. That turned Killua's MAK mode on and he argued with the examiner and even threatened him until he had no choice but to promote me to the professional hunter's level, which was a total negative lapse for me 'cause I had been practicing my nen with Wing-san and totally had my hold on it.

I sighed. Killua had a lose screw. "Anyway.", I said. "You should go out you know."

"With you?", he said curling his fingers around my hand.

With Zushi things were always complicated. It was hard for him to accept the fact that we could just be friends and nothing more.

"Zushi.", I said pulling my hand back. Ughhh. I hated it when we had to go through this everytime. "You know, you should start dating."

He sighed.

"I know a girl, she's awesome."

"Nahh.", said smiling, which was obviously a fake smile.

I took his hand trying to cheer him up. "She's a strawberry blonde."

"I like brunettes.", his voice was serious.

"She could dye her hair you know, she really likes you."

"Mmm. Your hands are freezing."

"Umm.. yeah hatsu. Did I mention that she said you were cute?"

He rolled his eyes.

"Is that a no?"

"Not it's a yes minus yes."

I groaned. "Zushi..."

Wing-san lightly knocked the door and came in with a tray. He handed me and Zushi a cup of tea.

"Thanks, smells greats.", I said taking in the refreshing scent.

"I can see your hatsu is getting stronger day by day, I could feel your nen when you were down the street."

"Yeah, ice is probably my thing, y'know, cool on the inside, cool on the outside."

"Any news about the boys?"

I sighed and looked out of the window. "No."

"Right..", Wing-san said apologetically.

"Look at the time, will ya? I better get going, I've got homework and stuff.", I said trying to ignore the lump in my throat.

"Okay, have a nice evening."

"You too, bye Zushi, if you ever feel like hanging out, just give me a ring.", I said, extending my pinky and thumb out, forming a telephone.

He nodded and smiled. I loved his smile, it was so contagious.

I got out of the flat and headed towards my apartment. It was small no doubt, a bedroom, a bathroom and a kitchen, but it was perfect for me. I took the keys out of my pocket and unlocked the door. I threw my bag on the floor and went to my room.

I entered the bathroom and splashed hot water on my face, to calm my nerves.

Homework. The last thing I felt like doing. I got in my pijamas, which were my underwear and Killua's blue button down shirt, I always wore it to bed, it had his scent all over it and made me feel like he was here, with me. In short, it made me feel at home.

I flipped through the annoying books and uselessly tried to solve my maths equations, which I was awful at. After about twenty minutes of nothing I shut the books. Patience. I would copy them down from Lil.

My life was the exact definition of boredom, I was sure it wouldn't be long until people started saying this is so "Claire's life.", instead of this is so boring.

I was in such a bad mood I felt like breaking something and my back was hurting like hell.

My cell phone buzzed. "Thinking about me?"

It was a text from Zushi. I smiled. "Yeah, you bet."

"Wanna go for ice cream tomorrow?"

"Yeah, sure."

"Great.."

"Can I bring my friend?"

"No, it's not an open invitation."

"She's cute y'know?"

"Mmm."

"Her name's Lilly, what's cuter than that?"

"Oh, I only like girls with C and Z initials."

"Yeah, I just remebered, she's french or something so, her name's spelled like C'Lilly or Z'lilly something.."

"Shut up and go to bed."

"Meanie."

"I'll see you at four sharp, night."

"Get lost. I hope you choke on your dinner, night."

"Yeah, love you too, night."

"Gross. Shut the hell up, night.", I giggled. That idiot was always able to lift my mood up.

I put my cell phone back on my side table and opened the drawer. I pulled out a neatly folded piece of paper and read the two words written in an ordinary script, but it was special to me, it was the most beautiful script in the world, it was Killua's. "Me too."

Just two words, written in dark blue ink, hid an ocean of emotions. The "Me.", which indicated him, a perfect and absolutely flawless being, and the "too.", which described the fact that he returned the feelings I felt for him, which probably made me the luckiest girl alive. He could have written "2" instead of "too." to save time, but he wrote the whole word, and he could have written "to.", by mistake, but as I mentioned earlier he was flawless so that was out of the question.

I sighed. If people could read minds, they'd probably think I was crazy.

One year, 8765.81 hours, 525949 minutes, 31536000 seconds. That's how long it had been since I last saw him, last touched him, last seen the glory of his wonderful blue eyes. The most painful part of missing him? That I had to go through this every night, and it only got worse every single day.

"You promised me you would wait for me. What else would I want? To win the lottery?", Killua's words echoed in my mind.

"I wish you could understand just what you are to me.", Zushi's words, the first time he opened up to me, it was one of the most awful days of my life, I started hating myself after that, for causing him so much pain. Even though he had been brave enough to tell me, there was nothing else I could do but break his heart.

I wondered what would happen if Killua and Zushi ever met. I mean they already knew each other, but under these new circumstances and the fact that Killua was an over-protective, competitive MAK, I was sure things were going to get pretty awkward.

The boys here in Easter Padokia had raised my ego a good lot. Not only Zushi, but about eighteen other boys had asked me out in the past year and not only once. Maybe it was because I started wearing heels, or maybe 'cause I acted all reserved and agressive, or maybe because the change I felt inside had also started showing on the outside.

7:45 am. My alarm buzzed leaving me cursing at the start of the day. I tried to kick my cell phone to the floor, but by the time I actually managed to do that, I was already wide awake. I groaned. I already knew this day was going to be just wonderful.

I took my clothes off and turned the shower on. The hot water felt amazing, It would only be a matter of time until the water turned cold due to my nen, so I enjoyed it while it was still burning.

What to wear.. what to wear? It's just gonna be another random fucked-up day, just wear any damn thing Claire.

I ended up in jeans shorts and a grey long sleeved shirt, which I loved because it was really soft, and not because it matched the colour of Killua's hair, and black boots, it just had to be those boots.

I forced the cereal down my throat with the milk and hurried out the door with my bag. Something felt awkward today, I just couldn't put my finger on it, was it because I wasn't wearing laces today? But I didn't wear them yesterday either so, it definately was something else.

I sometimes wished I had a lucky horse shoe, or maybe a four-leaved clover so, I could atleast convince myself that today was going to be good. Clovers, reminded me of Killua, even horse shoes reminded me of him, 'cause I once had a dream I was riding with Killua off to paradise, okay this was way too awkward, my crazy thoughts, my childish dreams, everything reminded me of him, and everything was about him.

I entered the school gate carefully looking around myself, I still hadn't thought of a good excuse to tell Lil, Zushi had just made my life a good ten percent more complicated, what if I bumped into her all of a sudden, what would I tell her?

The main hall was really crowded, which was a bonus because she would find it hard to spot me. As I headed to my locker I saw the three boys I argued with after school, okay so, agrued wasn't the right word, the dark haired one had a black eye which he unsuccessfully tried to hide under shades. Shame on you Claire, what are you, a beast?

Suddenly a loud squeak in my ear made me jump.

"Bah.", I said putting my hand on my chest trying to calm myself.

I already knew who it was even before I turned to see. "Lil! Do you really want me to die out of a cardiac arrest?", I almost shouted.

"Sorry!", her eyes were brighter than emeralds and her voice was high-pitched due to the excitement.

I started hating myself all of a sudden. I would be the one who would disappoint her.

"H-E-L-L-O?", she waved her hand infront of my face.

"Yeah? What?", I said shaking my head.

"So... did you ask him?"

"Ask who?", I played dumb. I tried unlocking my locker.

She gave me a disappointed look. "Spit it out, what did he say?"

"Uhh.", I finally managed to unlock it. "I forgot to ask him, you know, I saw a rainbow on the way home and I followed it to the end and I found that leprechaun with the gold pot, and you know... how complicated these things get, right?"

She glared at me.

"He said he's going to be busy on that day.", I lied as convincigly as I could.

She sighed. "So he said no, man, guess I'm stuck with Will after all, what do I tell him? You'll break his nose..?", man how did she always know when I was lying?

I laughed. "Yeah, and legs too if he doesn't listen."

"Right.", she sighed loudly.

"Seriously Lil, Zushi's an idiot, he doesn't know what he's missing, trust me."

She sighed again, louder.

"What?"

She dropped her gaze and sighed again.

"O...kay, this isn't about Zushi anymore, is it?"

She immediately took both of my hands in hers. "Please, please, please, go to prom."

"Aw, Lil... I can't."

She gave me her puppy dog eyes.

I raised an eyebrow. "Really? Are we doing this again?"

She pouted.

I sighed. "I..."

The bell rang and saved me once again. If bells ever died, I hoped this one went straight to heaven.

I freed my hands and gave her an apologetic smile. "Can't be late to a class on friday, right?"

She groaned. "I will.."

But I was already half way past her, I sped my pace up and entered the second room to the left, my first class today was history.

I walked to my usual seat and found a boy, with messy brown hair and blue eyes, sitting on the seat next to me. That was what always happened, there was always a new guy next to my seat everyday, who gave it his best shot at asking me out until I scared the hell out of him.

I drew my chair back and sat down.

"Hi, Dylan.", he held his hand out.

I gave him a light nod and faced the black board.

"You must be Claire Gaspardo, I've heard so much about you."

"Mmm.", why couldn't he just shut up?

"I usually sit in the back, but I thought it would be nice if we got to know each other, no?"

"No.", I said in a flat voice.

The professor enetered and called the class to order.

The roman culture, that's what we'd be studying today. Annoying. Even though they were probably my ancestors.

The teacher started the lecture. Mrs. Greene. One of the most passionate teachers I knew. She always got so much lost in the topic she started using her hands without even noticing, which reminded me of the feats children did while playing with paper planes. I bit back a giggle.

"You're italian right?.", again him? The annoying boy to my side said.

I took a deep breath and nodded. Did he want to die so bad?

"You know, I heard, among the italians, romans in paticular used to be very romantic."

I clentched my teeth. I faced him and smiled. "If you don't shut up they won't be the only people who used to be."

Shock and fear crossed his face and he quickly looked away.

I mentally patted myself on the back. Well done. Must be the italian blood.

2pm. I was in the cafeteria scrawling on a notebook just for something to do, I wasn't the least bit hungry. I wished I had a magic pen so whatever I wrote came true. The first thing I would write would be "Killua and Claire will always be together, no matter what.", wouldn't it be amazing if that really did happen?

"What's a Killua?", Lil asked as she examined the doodles and scrawls on my page.

I looked down only to realize that I had written his name all over the page without even realizing it. I pursed my lips.

"It's a... specie of chameleon.", in my head I imagined a grey haired lizard with blue eyes and shivered at the thought.

She raised her eyebrows. "Since when are you interested in amphibians?"

I raised an eyebrow. "Lil... chameleons are reptiles."

She formed an "O" shape with her lips and blushed. "Right.", she was horrible at science subjects.

I smiled and shook my head. "When will these damned five minutes pass?", I said glancing down at my watch. Why wasn't that heavenly bell ringing?

"In five minutes."

I sighed. Maybe in five years, I thought. I mentally took a look at my agenda. Go home. Do nothing. Do nothing again. Go for ice-cream with Zushi at four. Do nothing again. Probably hunt down a leprechaun and steal his gold pot, to turn that dumb lie into reality, 'cause I hated lying.

Finally the bell rang. "Yes.", I whispered and did the fist lowering thingy.

"Walk you home?", Lil asked. Probably still willing to talk me into going to prom.

"Fine.", I wasn't going to listen anyway.

"And dancing is good for your feet.", Lil said, who was illustrating all the advantages of going to prom, as we were near the parking lot.

"Mmm.", she was so persistent.

"And who knows? You just might have that.. first kiss?"

I mentally laughed. She thought I never kissed. "Ooh.", I said rolling my eyes.

"Dance floors are..", we both stopped as we saw about thirty girls standing in a circle around a parking spot, giggling and whispering excitedly.

"What's happening?", I asked curiously.

Lil shrugged.

That was the moment I had a weird feeling in my stomach. My guts were telling me, "go see what it is."

I walked to the crowd and pushed the girls to get a look. I couldn't see a thing. What was I doing? I felt like if I didn't see what was there I'd die or something. I got on my toes and suddenly I froze.

My heart stopped for that damned second and then it started beating so fast, I thought it would come out of my chest. I lost my balance.

"Woah, are you okay?", Lil asked in a concerned voice as she caught my arm.

I breathed deeply trying to calm myself. I freed my arm from Lil's hand and pushed the girls aside with more force than necessary.

"Hey! What the.."

"Watch where you're.."

All background voices. "A year isn't a joke.", it wasn't. "Eternal love.", he was right. "I love you too.", did he still? "Me too."

I wasn't controlling my feet. They were moving on their own, to where I belonged. I wasn't crying, I never cried a single tear after that night, after he left. My walking was even. I walked to who owned me, and to my content he was mine as well.

He wasn't the same boy. I was sure. His silver hair were slightly longer, his blue eyes thickly lashed and his eyebrows slightly curved as he was typing something on his cell phone. Black blazer, white collared shirt and jeans, nope he wasn't that boy anymore. He leaned causually against what I recognized as a glossy black mercedes. His style, his swag, he could make all the girls around faint with a single wink, I was sure. He just stood there careless and tempting, like he owned the place.

As I walked to him, I'm sure he heard the clicks, I was truly grateful I wore heeled boots and that my legs were exposed, it made me look exactly like I wanted him to see me. He passed a hand through his hair and slowly looked up. His face went blank for a very short moment. He raised an eyebrow and lifted one corner of his mouth in a smile, which was absolutely the hottest thing I had ever seen, did he practice a year to make it that perfect? There he was, sixteen year old Killua Zoldyck.


	11. Fights And Heights

Hey, hey, hey! What's up guys? Okay so here's a new chapter, and I did update really late, but that's how it's gonna be from now on, I'm gonna update once every month...yeah. I'm about to have my exams and everything so it's hard t squeeze out some time for writing. Anyway. You guys have to read this chapter and review! Thank you for all your previous reviews, I love you all, alot. So okay just... yeah you should read, I'll just post some more comments at the end of the chap ;) :|

Chapter: 11

"Fights And Heights."

The people we choose, the chances we take, we stumble and fall, but that's how we find our way.

"People are always loved for what they have.", that's what I was always told. Which basically meant, "If you have money, you can have it all, if you have looks as well, even better."

How sad, that some people related the most beautiful of emotions with one's posessions and physical appearance. But I didn't blame my family, that's how they saw life. The world ran on money, that was bitter truth. The black suited filthy rich jerks would just throw a pile of cash and have others to their feet.

If my family knew only a quarter of the meaning of "love", I'd probably still be at home, with them, which I was glad didn't happen. It was in these years of life that I realized that sometimes life doesn't give us what we want, not because we don't deserve it, but because we deserve better.

I always thought I was cursed or damned, my family hated me, and they even managed to make me hate myself. But life right now, in this moment felt perfect, and I was ready to go through it all once again if I was just assured I would be brought back to this moment, to the best part of my life.

I felt like a model on the ramp, but the clumsy one. Sure, I was acting casual on the outside, but the child in me dancing with excitement. It was like being frozen but melting at the same time. It felt good, but the intensity of the feeling turned it into pain. It felt so good it hurt.

As I approached, my heartbeat increased. This was one of those pleasure-pain moments, like eating an ice-cream and having a brain freeze, or going through sleep less nights just to finish reading an amazing book.

He lifted his gaze and the moment he saw me, his expression turned blank. I saw gleam in his eyes as they examined me head to toe and the corner of his mouth lifted up in something between a smile and a smirk, he was both teasing and admiring, but his face was even flawlesser than before, if that was even a word, and he looked exceptionally breath taking.

I ate up the distance between us with every step I took. That was the moment when my brain spilt in two. The one part which was completely focused on Killua, while the other feeling the gazes of the crowd around us. I felt like I could almost hear the thoughts of every single person around me. But somehow, I couldn't bring my mind to care about it. All I was thinking about, and all I wanted right now was the silver haired boy, who was now only inches away from me.

He extended his arm and lightly put it around my waist. In the next second he was pulling me closer and closer. My heart almost stopped. Just the thought of him touching me was mind blowing. I quickly caught my breath.

"Look at you.", I said trying to be casual. On the inside I was dying. Literally. Okay not literally...

He raised an eyebrow. I was freaking out as he parted his lips to speak. He was about to speak. Had his voice changed? Or was it the same slightly husky, slightly velvet, unique one. What the hell, he was about to speak. "Just look? You can touch too, you know?"

The same seductive jerk. Loved it. But I was one step ahead of him. "Just touch? I was planning to do way more than that."

His eyes slightly widened, but he quickly composed his face and once again gave his smirky smile. "I can't wait to hear more.", he slightly lifted my chin up with his index finger. "But, first, let me get you out of here.", he winked.

I felt like I just threw up my heart and swallowed it back in. He took my hand and opened the door to the passenger seat. I quickly got in and wore my seatbelt. A few second's later Killua was in the driver's seat. I took an unwilling glace out of the wind shield. Surprised, shocked and horrified faces. But among all of them, only one had a different expression, one of betrayal, excitement and genuine happiness, Lil. I knew she was mad at me, who wouldn't be if their best friend suddenly got in a car and went away with some crazy, hot dude, she seemed like to know forever, but never even mentioned once. Yup, she was mad.

As her gaze met mine, I pursed my lips, and gave her an apologetic expression. She glared at me. I mouthed the words, "I'll call you later.", and quickly looked away. This was totally embarassing. About thirty girls were looking at Killua with an expression that was more suitable for puppies when they saw a steak, how the hell did he managed to act so casual? I gulped.

A minute later we were driving out o the school parking lot. I sighed. "Killua."

"Yeah?"

"How did you know I was here?"

"Long story, you know. We had to go to the police and borrow a few blood hounds and give them your scent and then..."

"Hilarious.", I interrupted him. Even after a year the bad jokes and sarcasm were still there. I smiled.

"Mobile detector.", he said looking straight at the road. "Which reminds me, why do you even keep a cell phone, if you don't use it?"

I pulled out my cell phone. There were about ten unread text messages, and five missed calls. "Aren't you underage to drive?", I said trying to change the topic.

"Yes, but I have my ways."

"Which probably have Leorio involved, right?"

"Probably..."

"When did you guys get here? I mean in the world?"

"I don't know about Gon, but I was born at 2:30am."

"Funny."

"About two days ago."

I looked at him in disbelief. "And you just got here now?"

"We were in rags, Leorio took us shopping."

I once again examined his quite formal look. That blazer was... it was something alright. "Still not a good enough excuse and besides I thought you hated shopping."

"We were tired and yes I do hate shopping but as I mentioned earlier, Leorio took us shopping.", he said Leorio's name in a funny way.

He freed one of his hands from the stirring wheel and took mine. His thumb lightly stroking the back of my hand, his light electric shocks sent chills down my spine.

"So...", my voice was a bit shaky. "Where are we going?"

"If it was upto me, I'd stop the car right now and make out with you.", I almost stopped breathing. "Because believe me, I really want to, but, I promised Gon I'd have you to him in an hour, and then home and we're already late."

"Where's home?"

"Home's in York New."

"Wait, you mean we're flying to York New, today?", I asked shocked.

"No, sunday morning, we're staying in the hotel til then."

"Killua, I've got finals next week, I can't leave right now."

"Next week? We're not even staying in York New til next week."

"Wait, what? Where are we going?", I asked looking at his face.

He didn't turn, his gaze was fixed on the road. He let go of my hand. "Long story, just tell me one thing, do you wanna go with me or not?", his voice was serious, sort of threatening.

"Of-ofcourse I do, but..."

"No buts, you can stay here or you can go with us, it's upto you, no one's forcing you.", his tone was completely normal, which made it even more frightening.

I rubbed my temples. We just saw each other after a year and we were already fighting. I took a deep breath. I could skip finals, and try again next year. Killua was important.

"Okay, take me to my apartment so I can get my stuff."

He nodded. He was definately mad.

"First street to the left."

That was it. I just told him the directions and he followed, except that we were both quiet.

"Uh.. I'll be back in five minutes.", I said getting out.

He ignored me and opened his door and followed me in. My hands were so sweaty the keys kept slipping. He grabbed my wrist with his hand and took the keys.

"It's the..", I said as I saw him pick out the right key. "Yeah that one."

He entered the hall way. I took off my boots and went to my room. I opened my closet and drawers and threw everything I found on the floor. He was there leaning against the frame of the door watching me carefully, which made me nervous. I slid past him and opened the cupboard near the kitchen and unsuccessfully tried to grab the bag inside. I got on my toes, and even jumped several times, still no use, my 5 feet, three inches just weren't enough. I was about to try again with my heeled boots on, when Killua appeared from behind and just lightly extending his arm took the bag out and handed it to me.

"Err.. thanks.", I said taking in his dramatically increased height. "Killua?"

"Hmm."

"Exactly how tall are you?"

"5'10.", he said walking back to my room.

I quickly caught up with him and grabbed his arm. "Killua, look, I'm really sorry... I-I shouldn't have said that."

He freed his arm. He walked to my bed and sat down. "Yeah, you really shouldn't have said that."

I clentched my teeth. Jerk. That was all the sorry he was going to get from my part. I took all my clothes and quickly stuffed them in the bag. No time for folding. Might as well take some of my books with me. I took my school bag from where I threw it on the floor and held it upside down shaking it. All the books and the stationary fell down. Biology, definately. Maths, unwillingly yes and all the other sciences. I was still deciding when I saw Killua lean down and pick up a crumpled piece of paper which was lying near my pens. He slowly unfolded it and examined it carefully.

I stopped breathing as soon as I recognized the paper as the prom flyer Lil showed me yesterday. So she put it in my bag. Traitor.

I sighed and stood up, heading for the closet, when suddenly Killua arms were around me. He pressed my back to his chest and took both my hands in his inter lacing our fingers. He lips brushed on my throat and I could feel his even breathing. My heart sped up in an abnormal way. His mood shifts were unexplainable and unprecidctable. This was an awkward moment because the desires of punching him in the face and kissing him were exactly at the same level, which was, high.

He moved his hands to my shoulders and spun me around so I could face him. His eyes were so intense and impossible to read. Hot jerk. He pushed me back until I was against the wall. One of his hands moved to my hair while the other went to my left hip. My anger got the better of me.

"Don't you dare.", I spat.

I saw a new emotion flash into his eyes. I couldn't recognize it. He didn't look offended, not at all. It looked something like the thrilling emotion of accepting a challenge, sort of how kids looked on halloween. He took my chin between is thumb and index and smiled.

"Watch me."

I found myself counting each nano second until our lips actually met. They were familiar, they were the same, yet they were completely different. He took my earing between two of his fingers and twisted it lightly in each direction. His other hand moved from under my chin and suddenly slipped through my shirt to my back. I suddenly gasped as he caught me off guard. As soon as my lips parted his tongue slid into my mouth. Who was this boy? Was this even Killua? There was this new hot and agressive edge to his personality.

My anger started to evaporate, but not completely. I put both my arms around his neck and with all my force I stepped on his foot with my heels.

He broke the kiss. "Hell.", he cursed in a whisper.

I didn't cause as much damage as I intended to but still, I was satisfied.

"I see somebody's not getting their presents this year.", another mood shift.

I played along. "Oh, but Killua.", I said running my thumb on his lower lip. "All I want for christmas is you."

He chuckled. "And I'm yours.", he said placing his hand over his chest.

I rolled my eyes. I tried to slow my breathing down, I was practically panting.

"Anyway.", he said pressing at the "n". "I'm talking you to prom tomorrow."

I stopped doing whatever I was doing because I forgot what I was doing. What was I doing? "No.", I breathed.

"I didn't ask, I just told you and why would you say no?", he said folding his arms around his chest like this was the most serious thing in the world right now.

I gulped. Dancing. A sensitive topic for me. "I have my reasons."

"Im listening.", he pressed.

I took in a very deep breath. "Killua, seriously, we're really talking about prom?"

"Yes, yes we are."

"I thought you'd say no."

"I would have, but considering the fact that you're a girl, and girls like proms and I happen to be your boyfriend, you should have atleast tried to convince me."

Boyfriend. He said he was my boyfriend. "Killua... why would I wanna go to school on saturday.", he opened his mouth to protest. I raised my finger. "Yes, I know it's not like really going to school but it's still like going to school, on a saturday, saturday the second of...", I stopped at mid sentence when it suddenly clicked.

"What?", Killua asked concerned.

"Umm... nothing, nothing.", I said shaking my head. "Bottom line I'm not going to prom and let me pack, because I really wanna hurry up and meet Gon."

"Fine.", did Killua just give up? The most stubborn person alive just gave up that easily? Had he really changed that much? It was hard to believe. If Killua wanted something he wouldn't be at peace until he got it, even if it was the most insignificant thing in the world, if he wanted it, he would have it. "But.", he said suddenly interrupting my thoughts. Ah, there was always the but, that's why he gave up, he had something else in mind. That was so Killua style. "I wanna clear some things between us.", his tone was serious.

"Go on.", I encouraged.

He sighed and took my hand. "Since we're always fighting, I thought we should, roll according to some...", he tried to find the right word.

"Rules?"

"Yes, rules."

"Like ground rules?"

He groaned. "Whatever rules."

"Whatever rules, I like that. Okay."

"I will make up a rule, you tell me if you're okay with it, and then you get to make one."

"Oh, how many will there be?"

"That depends, there's no fixed number or anything, we can keep adding whenever we want to.", he said playing with my fingers.

"Fine."

"Okay rule number one, we won't stop talking to each other even if we're mad."

I nodded. "That sounds about right."

"Yeah, now it's your turn."

"We will try to compromise?", we both knew that was impossible. Still, good to have our hopes up.

"Okay."

"And you will try to control your mood shifts.", I quickly injected.

"What mood shifts?", he asked like he really had no idea, which was possible. Having two personalities in a single body and not even slightly being aware of that, in Killua's case that was possible. For him it was probably just like wanting one flavour ice-cream one moment, and then changing your mind the next.

"The...", suddenly I felt a sharp pain at the back of my head. I gasped.

"Are you okay?", Killua took my hand. "Answer me.", his voice turned slightly hysteric when I didn't.

I took a deep breath as the pain faded. "Yeah?"

"What happened?"

"Nothing, nothing, I just...", try to make it sound convincing. "Remebered something important."

"You're lying.", he sighed.

"I'm not lying."

"You are."

"I'm not, what makes you say that anyway?"

"You never look in my eyes when you lie."

I realized I was staring at his chest. I locked my gaze with his or a second and then quickly turned away. "See?"

He sighed. "I'm glad you didn't end up working for the mafia, you'd suck."

The mafia. I stopped breathing. What would he do if he found out that... I crossed my fingers and prayed it wouldn't be anytime soon. I faked a smile.

"Is it okay if I say that I'm totally freaking out?", I asked Killua as we entered the Corona hotel, where we were staying til sunday afternoon, and Gon was here. Waiting. For us. He was waiting for us. For me in particular.

The building was magnficent. The theme was "Gold.". Everything around us was golden and different shades of yellow. The walls inside had a very delicate stripe print. The floors were covered in a thick golden, glittery carpet with extended throughout the whole room.

Killua took my hand and we entered the elevator. He pressed the button to the seventh floor. As the doors closed he leaned towards me and whispered, his lips touching my ear lobe. "Is it okay if I say that I totally want you in my bed right now?"

My heart skipped a beat. "Killua.", I sighed.

He chuckled. This was his most favourite thing in the world. Annoying me with bad bed jokes.

I passed my hand over the black fabric of his blazer. "This looks so good on you, and the pants.", I said examining his well pressed jeans.

"Do you wanna get in them?", he asked shamelessly.

I groaned. "No, thank you."

He laughed at my annoyed tone. He looked so beautiful when he was happy, I always forgot I was supposed to be mad at him.

I leaned my head on his chest and inhaled his scent. Musk and leather with a slight trace of vanilla.

"You can have the blazer too, I think you're in love with it.", he said.

I sighed and pulled back. "Right, I want all your clothes."

He took both of my hands in his. "I'd be happy to give them all to you, on one condition."

I raised and eyebrow. "What?", I asked suspiciously.

He bit back a smirk. "You'll have to take them off whenever I tell you to."

I rolled my eyes.

"That could be a new rule, you know?"

Finally the elevator stopped and the doors opened. I looked carefully at the end of the hall narrowing my eyes. Mentally calculating the chances I had of running right to the end, without falling down. What? I was clumsy and not very poised. Not my fault.

"Less than a two percent and let's not forget you're wearing heels."

I turned to look at Killua, surprised.

"What? You were thinking out loud.", he shrugged.

I felt like digging a hole and burrying myself into it. Once again I thanked the God of unblushed or non-blushed or basically my blood deficiency for never making me blush.

"Are you gonna move? Or do you want me to carry you, because I could.."

I put a hand over his mouth. "Seriously? I'm seeing Gon in like five minutes. Do you really want me to have those fantasies?"

His lips parted under my hand to protest.

"And the only way that I'm going to have sex with you is if I'm drunk.", I whispered.

He raised an eyebrow and removed my hand from his mouth. "Is that so?"

"Yeah."

"Okay, I have two things to say to that. Is that so? I bet I could make you do it whenever I want to, and if that is so, then I'd like to inform you that my very presence makes you drunk."

I pursed my lips. "Okay, be honest. What would you do if I actually told you that I was ready, and I wanted you, like now."

He raised an eyebrow. "I'd call Gon this damn second and tell him that something unexpected just came up and we won't b able to make it, then I'd take you back to your apartment, lock the doors and make you forget your name."

I felt like for a second my breath was stuck in my throat and I got the weirdest feeling in my stomach, like it was full of needles. "You're lying. I remember last time. You just act cool on the outside and like you're..."

"I'm?"

"Y' know, whatever you want to show that you are.", I waved my hands up and down. One of the things I did when I was confused. Or just, always. "But, I bet that if, like, I'd say let's do it, I wouldn't be freaked out as much as you would be, you'd be the first to run away.", I said in a single breath.

He chuckled and took my hands. "Breathe."

I did as I was told.

"You're right.", he took a lock of my hair and tucked it behind my ear. "Back then I would have run away. But I think you're forgetting that we just went through a really long gap. I don't know what you've seen throughout this whole year, but I feel like I've changed, and I admit that there still are alot of things I'm unsure about, but this.", his put his hand on my cheek, "You, I can never have doubts about you. Not anymore. I did, I'm not ashamed of saying it out loud. But being away from you, you have no idea what it was, what I've gone through.", he sighed. "Anyway, what I wanted to say was that I'm ready, I'll always be ready for you, but I won't ever force you into something you'll feel like you're gonna regret in the morning. Just know that whether you're unsure, insecure, or you've got doubts I'll always love you, no matter what, and when you feel like you trust me enough, I'll be here for you. Always... and not just in that way.", he lightly blushed.

I was speechless. I got on my toes and lightly put my lips on his. I grabbed his lower lip in both of mine, after five seconds I pulled back and leaned my head on his chest. I whisper laughed. "Who are you? And what have you done to Killua Zoldyck?"

He burried his face in my hair. "Mmm."

I took a few steps back and put my hand on his cheek. "I love you."

He smiled. "I know, it's inevitable."

I rolled my eyes.

He took my hand and started walking. "Come on, if we make him wait more than this, Gon's gonna be seriously pissed off and because that happens so rarely, I have to say, it is pretty scary to look at."

I stopped. "Okay I'm freaking out again."

"He's not going to eat you.", he smirked. "Although, I might take a bite.."

"No, really." I freed my hand and took a few steps back. "I think I'm going to be sick."

"So you wanna go back home?"

"I...", I bit my lip. "Yeah, I-I can't..."

He sighed. "I didn't think it would come to this.", he slowly walked to me.

"What?", I paced back. "Come to what?", my back touched the doors of the elevator. Dead end.

He leaned down a bit, and just when I thought he was about to kiss me, he slid his arm around my knees and threw me on his shoulder.

"What the..", I punched his back. "Killua!"

He started walking towards the end of the hall and turned to the right.

I started kicking, but it was just as useful as hitting an iron wall.

He stopped infront of a door with a gold tag that read "09". There was a little monitor screen with a keypad right next to the it.

"No, no, no.", I pulled at his hair with everything I had. "Don't."

"Stop it.", he scratched his hair. I felt a wave of triumph run through me. I had caused him damage, I had caused damage to Killua Zoldyck. "That tickles.", he said annoyed.

I pursed my lips. I felt like peeling a banana in the corner of a dark and lonely cave. Ofcourse I didn't hurt him. He wasn't human.

He entered some digits of the screen and unlocked the door.

"Okay you can put me down now."

He let go of me and I jumped down. He put both his hands on my shoulders and spun me around.

My mouth fell open. The penthouse was absolutely amazing. Two huge windows dominated the front wall. The glass was so finely polished it was hard to see.

The view was breath taking, you could see half of the city from here. I was sure if I looked hard enough, I could find my house.

The golden metal frame of the windows ended at the bottom with an onyx marble strip which touched the furry blue carpet that extended throughout. There was plasma screen on the side wall, infront of it was a big white leather sofa. Right in the middle of the room there was a pole like thingy. The walls on the three sides were covered up in different parts by pictures and paintings. There was a corridor on the left side, which slightly revealed a glimpse of two wooden doors at its end, which were probably the bedrooms.

"So, how do like it?", he said resting his head on his hands, which were on my right shoulder.

"Woah.", was all I could manage to say.

"Your stuff is already in my room.", he pointed to the first door, which I now saw that it had four block shapes on it.

"Right.", I nodded and walked to the one room I had missed, which was right near the entrance.

I glanced inside. The floor was of a very light shade of white marble and it was polished to perfection. It was the kitchen, but it looked completely untouched, like no one had ever even stepped in it. There was an oven, a stove and all the spoons and utensils were arranged in perfect order, hanging on the wall.

"What is this a museum? Seriously, this place needs to be used.", I turned to see a surprised looking Killua staring at me in disbelief like I had just told the worst sexual joke of all times.

"What?"

He shook his head, like I just missed something obvious. "You know I can't cook, I know you can't cook and let's not talk about Gon, he'd do worse than you, wait no, he wouldn't."

I glared at him.

"There's a restaurant at the bottom floor, if you need anything. So, don't worry. We're safe, we won't have to deal with the amazing skills you happen to have in the kitchen."

"For your information, I can cook."

"Oh really?"

"Yes.", I said I could cook, not that I was good at it, or what I made was edible.

"Okay then, you'll make me breakfast tomorrow morning."

"Fine. What do you want?", I shrugged.

"Anything.", He walked to the sofa and plopped down.

I crossed his side and sat on the arm of the sofa opposite to him. "Where's Gon?"

He put his arms behind his head and closed his eyes. "Shower."

I passed a hand through my hair. "So, what's the deal?"

"Mmm?"

"I mean, going to York New and stuff, what's all that about?"

"We just have to do some paperwork for the Nostrads, a favour for Kurapika."

I laughed in disbelief. "Killua, seriously? You really think I'm going to buy that?"

If there was one thing I had learnt about Killua in the past year was that he never did favours, he never did anything except there was anything in it for him. He wasn't selfish, he was always there for the people he loved, but he was materialistic, realistic, he always weighed his options, always thought, not twice, but thrice before he acted. Ofcourse Kurapika was a friend, but Kurapika was Gon's friend, and if Killua ever did happen to do anything for him that would only be for three reasons: Gon would get something out of it, he would get something out of it, or both of them would get something out of it.

He smiled his eyes still closed. He patted his legs with one hand inviting me.

I quickly hopped off and sat down on his lap, leaning my head on his shoulder and putting my hand on his chest.

"I wanna know everything, and by everything, I mean everything."

He took one of my hands and put it on his cheek, it was burning under my palm. I waited but he didn't say anything, he was only humming lightly and drumming his fingers on the arm of the sofa.

I carefully listened to the tune and I almost bit my tongue off when I recognized it.

I need to know your lips, nothing ever mattered to me more than this. It was one of my favourite songs, the one I had been listening to most recently. I couldn't help but giggle. "You've been checking my playlist again haven't you?"

He peeked through his eyelashes. "No, I happen to listen to music too."

"You do, but you listen to Beethoven, not The Vamps."

"Actually this is a mere coincidence and I am surprised that for the first time in a century we're actually agreeing, not exactly agreeing, but subconciously and accidentally we're on the same page.", his spoke with his eyes closed. "Not in harmony.", he added. "But on the same page."

We both remained silent for a while.

"So what's going on? Are we fighting now?", he asked.

"I don't know, I guess we are, I mean, are we?"

He raised his eyebrows. "Doesn't seem so."

"Yeah.", I looked down. I noticed Killua's legs were a good 5 or 6 inches longer, how the hell did he get so tall? Was it because he entered that game and somehow got mutated or something? If that was so, Gon must have grown too. I wasn't sure if he'd be exactly as tall as Killua, there was slight difference in their height a year back, so, if not just as much, Gon must have grown tall some what close to how much Killua had. According to him, Killua was a 5'10, then Gon must be a what? 5'8, 9? Why did it matter so much? I had no idea, but now that it did, I wouldn't be at peace until I found out.

I got up from his lap and spun around to face him, taking a few steps back. "How tall has Gon gotten, exactly?"

"I don't know.", he shrugged.

"Is he taller than you?"

"No, but he's taller than you.", he chuckled. "Dwarfy."

I glared at him. "What is that supposed to mean?"

"You're small, short, like a little dwarf."

"I am not short.", I pronouced each word clearly. "This is the average height for girls of my age."

He chuckled.

I groaned. "So is he this tall?", I said raising my hand by a few inches.

"No, taller."

I got on my toes and raised my hand to the maximum height it could reach. "This tall?"

He smiled. "A bit shorter."

I lowered my hand, still looking at him. "Now?"

His smile was fixed on his face like something funny was going on. I knew I was acting like an idiot, but there was just no taming me when I really wanted something, even though it was stupid and unreasonable. "Just a bit more."

I lowered my hand a bit more, just when I did I felt my palm tuch something pricky and wet. I quickly pulled my hand back and jumped back. "Wha.."

"Hey.", a spiky haired boy with big brown eyes said.

"He.. Gon.", I breathed.

He was hardly recognizable. I mean he was still Gon, but not... Gon. He was taller, almost as tall as Killua, leaner and his physique was very well built. He wore a collared button down shirt, which seemed impossible, because I had never seen him in anything besides the green pull over and shorts he always wore. His big brown eyes were just as shiny and determined, but they had a touch of maturity in them now.

I didn't move, I couldn't move. It felt like the ice in my nen had actually spread throughout me. Before I could actually think or understand anything, I found myself in Gon's arms. His spiky hair pricked at my shoulder, but it felt so good, I would hug him even if he had needles instead of hair.

He smelled like the shore and home. The only needles he could ever be were that of a compass, he guided me, he felt like a destination.

For that fraction of a second, I felt relief, and I couldn't remember the last time I actually felt that, it was like my life was complete again, like that year worth of waiting was actually worth it. There was no way I was leaving these boys, not now, not ever. Whether we went straight to hell or rode on a cloud to paradise, I always wanted to be by their side. They were like that "Home Sweet Home." frame, hung on every house's door.

I knew Killua would always be there for me. I loved him all, his bad jokes, his sarcastic replies, even his mood shifts. I didn't care if all we did was fight or there was a huge difference in our heights, that wasn't anywhere near to stopping me from wanting him and having him, fights, heights, didn't matter, we were right for each other, we were like my mismatched socks and that's all that mattered to me.

Okay so, what is going on? What is Claire hiding from Killua? And what is it that Killua hasn't told her yet? Stick around guys 'cause after this the story is getting interesting, and before the Chimera Ant arc there's going to be this arc of my own, which is totally going to be related to that. So, yeah. Review.


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